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<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar *" data-source="post: 659196" data-attributes="member: 17461">Could you share a nightmare here, SWOT?&nbsp; When I do that, the pieces fall into place, one at a time.&nbsp; Remember the dream about hair, and the memories it called about WalMart and whore and self?Oh, yes.&nbsp; I love it that we don't have a therapist.&nbsp; I would be too afraid to free associate, if we had a therapist.&quot;We already got one.&quot;&nbsp; &quot;Oh yes, it's very nice.&quot;&nbsp; (That's the Frenchman, responding to everyone who thinks we need to do what they tell us.)What does whole look like, Copa?Ha!&nbsp; I love this.:O)Copa, are you volunteering?I am a Hospice volunteer.&nbsp; No commitment; pure joy, to serve in that way.Baklava grand volunteers in animal shelters.&nbsp; No commitment; pure joy, to serve in that way.Is the room where you sleep and rest and contemplate beautiful, Copa?&nbsp; Have you created a haven, or....&nbsp; Are the sheets and the comforters and the pillows there to comfort, or.... Perhaps you and M might consider moving, or travel.Change things up.Never go back.There was a string of years when my sister had little.&nbsp; Then, there was a string of years when she has had enough.&nbsp; When she has had enough, she overhears people saying things like, &quot;Oh, that's so and so.&nbsp; She has more money than Jesus.&quot;&nbsp; When she has had enough, she does things like repeat her name continually to the shop person.&nbsp; And then, joke with her husband, who falls right into line, as this is an old joke between them, about how the shop keepers in the most expensive shops know her by her first name, and about how uncomfortable that makes the husband.And they tell that story every time, in one version or another.And it could be very funny, but it's not.There is something here about the value of the sister's house and about the value system between myself and my sister, too.Something not right, until we decide to see it.Oh no, Copa!What a horribly hurtful thing.Yay!I think you can, and that you have already begun.&nbsp; I don't recall your having defined your situation to yourself before.&nbsp; I love it that you looked up meanings of words that meant something to you.&nbsp; That is an excellent tool!Cedar</blockquote>

[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar *, post: 659196, member: 17461"] Could you share a nightmare here, SWOT? When I do that, the pieces fall into place, one at a time. Remember the dream about hair, and the memories it called about WalMart and whore and self? Oh, yes. I love it that we don't have a therapist. I would be too afraid to free associate, if we had a therapist. "We already got one." "Oh yes, it's very nice." (That's the Frenchman, responding to everyone who thinks we need to do what they tell us.) What does whole look like, Copa? Ha! I love this. :O) Copa, are you volunteering? I am a Hospice volunteer. No commitment; pure joy, to serve in that way. Baklava grand volunteers in animal shelters. No commitment; pure joy, to serve in that way. Is the room where you sleep and rest and contemplate beautiful, Copa? Have you created a haven, or.... Are the sheets and the comforters and the pillows there to comfort, or.... Perhaps you and M might consider moving, or travel. Change things up. Never go back. There was a string of years when my sister had little. Then, there was a string of years when she has had enough. When she has had enough, she overhears people saying things like, "Oh, that's so and so. She has more money than Jesus." When she has had enough, she does things like repeat her name continually to the shop person. And then, joke with her husband, who falls right into line, as this is an old joke between them, about how the shop keepers in the most expensive shops know her by her first name, and about how uncomfortable that makes the husband. And they tell that story every time, in one version or another. And it could be very funny, but it's not. There is something here about the value of the sister's house and about the value system between myself and my sister, too. Something not right, until we decide to see it. Oh no, Copa! What a horribly hurtful thing. Yay! I think you can, and that you have already begun. I don't recall your having defined your situation to yourself before. I love it that you looked up meanings of words that meant something to you. That is an excellent tool! Cedar [/QUOTE]

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