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<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar *" data-source="post: 659354" data-attributes="member: 17461">Could you be lonely for her, Copa?&nbsp; Loving someone from whom we are separated is filled with contradictions.&nbsp; We want to know where and how they are, and we want to know why they don't love us.&nbsp; We keep searching with our determined eyes to learn the mystery of love between sisters.But our sisters don't love us, Copa.What poops.It is less the house and the stuff I think Copa, than a kind of imagining all that might have been.&nbsp; And all those endlessly circling questions about why.The more I see what my mom and my sister have done ~ no values added, no explanations, and, as SWOT tells us all the time, NO CHEATING...I am like, tossed into a salad maker or something.&nbsp; I get so stuck on the &quot;surely this can't be true&quot; part.&nbsp; LIke SWOT and me, you don't get to cheat either, Copa.&nbsp; For the sakes of our sanity, we have to stop seeing our sisters through &quot;that is my sister&quot;.&nbsp; It is a really sad thing that we don't have sisters who love us.&nbsp; But it is not life defining unless we allow it to be.Snip.My sister would have taken all the jewelry, too.***They are cold in their hearts, Copa.&nbsp; It is a dangerous thing, to love someone like that; it is dangerous to believe someone like that loves us.They are not like us, Copa and SWOT.&nbsp; They cannot be hurt by us; when they cry to us...I don't know why they do that.Ha!&nbsp; I am going to be so happy for you once you really, deep in your heart no question about it let this borderline idea go, SWOT.&nbsp; Your sister has been projecting, maybe.&nbsp; In a way, what she has done to you around the issue of borderline is similar to what that first therapist did to me.&nbsp; They name us&nbsp; something unclear, something with sharp edges, and we fill in the details.&nbsp; It is a very hard thing, to defend ourselves from an accusation.&nbsp; Like they say:&nbsp; &quot;When did you stop beating your wife?&quot;Now, why didn't I think of that, where that first therapist is concerned.What a wienie he was.Oh, I am so glad to leave that behind me.Thanks, you two.Cedar</blockquote>

[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar *, post: 659354, member: 17461"] Could you be lonely for her, Copa? Loving someone from whom we are separated is filled with contradictions. We want to know where and how they are, and we want to know why they don't love us. We keep searching with our determined eyes to learn the mystery of love between sisters. But our sisters don't love us, Copa. What poops. It is less the house and the stuff I think Copa, than a kind of imagining all that might have been. And all those endlessly circling questions about why. The more I see what my mom and my sister have done ~ no values added, no explanations, and, as SWOT tells us all the time, NO CHEATING...I am like, tossed into a salad maker or something. I get so stuck on the "surely this can't be true" part. LIke SWOT and me, you don't get to cheat either, Copa. For the sakes of our sanity, we have to stop seeing our sisters through "that is my sister". It is a really sad thing that we don't have sisters who love us. But it is not life defining unless we allow it to be. Snip. My sister would have taken all the jewelry, too. *** They are cold in their hearts, Copa. It is a dangerous thing, to love someone like that; it is dangerous to believe someone like that loves us. They are not like us, Copa and SWOT. They cannot be hurt by us; when they cry to us...I don't know why they do that. Ha! I am going to be so happy for you once you really, deep in your heart no question about it let this borderline idea go, SWOT. Your sister has been projecting, maybe. In a way, what she has done to you around the issue of borderline is similar to what that first therapist did to me. They name us something unclear, something with sharp edges, and we fill in the details. It is a very hard thing, to defend ourselves from an accusation. Like they say: "When did you stop beating your wife?" Now, why didn't I think of that, where that first therapist is concerned. What a wienie he was. Oh, I am so glad to leave that behind me. Thanks, you two. Cedar [/QUOTE]

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