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Substance Abuse
Hoping to hear some success stories
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<blockquote data-quote="Origami" data-source="post: 733815" data-attributes="member: 18099"><p>Hi Trying,</p><p>I'm not sure my story qualifies as "success," but maybe "improvement," which might be a more realistic and hoped-for outcome. When I first started posting here, my two difficult sons were embroiled in a crazy feud that led to fistfights, broken household items, and two police calls (by me). My older son was on house arrest and an active heroin addict, and younger son was a high-school dropout with no job and a bad attitude.</p><p></p><p>Today, older son (age 31) has finished a 5-month residential rehab, and is clean for the first time in over six years. He's got a part-time job with a real company, and is working on getting a full-time job and his own apartment. He's living with his wife in the meantime (they were estranged before), and has not asked to move back in with us.</p><p></p><p>Younger son (age 21) has now emerged from his lair (bedroom) and has had a full-time job for a few months. He is paying his own phone bill and a small amount of rent to us, and is saving to be able to move out at some point. He has calmed down a lot, and isn't nearly as much of an ass (sorry) as he used to be. To get to this point, he was in weekly therapy for several years, and I think simple maturity finally kicked in.</p><p></p><p>I'm happy for their improvements, but am under no illusions that this is permanent or that they won't go back to old habits. But I'm choosing to celebrate the good while not getting too wrapped up in future expectations.</p><p></p><p>So I'd say the other posters are all correct, the best hope of success is to work on yourself and how you deal with the issues. Although we all hope our children live positive, fulfilling lives, there is nothing we can do to make that happen. I've found that the support from this site and like-minded parents helps keep me on track.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Origami, post: 733815, member: 18099"] Hi Trying, I'm not sure my story qualifies as "success," but maybe "improvement," which might be a more realistic and hoped-for outcome. When I first started posting here, my two difficult sons were embroiled in a crazy feud that led to fistfights, broken household items, and two police calls (by me). My older son was on house arrest and an active heroin addict, and younger son was a high-school dropout with no job and a bad attitude. Today, older son (age 31) has finished a 5-month residential rehab, and is clean for the first time in over six years. He's got a part-time job with a real company, and is working on getting a full-time job and his own apartment. He's living with his wife in the meantime (they were estranged before), and has not asked to move back in with us. Younger son (age 21) has now emerged from his lair (bedroom) and has had a full-time job for a few months. He is paying his own phone bill and a small amount of rent to us, and is saving to be able to move out at some point. He has calmed down a lot, and isn't nearly as much of an ass (sorry) as he used to be. To get to this point, he was in weekly therapy for several years, and I think simple maturity finally kicked in. I'm happy for their improvements, but am under no illusions that this is permanent or that they won't go back to old habits. But I'm choosing to celebrate the good while not getting too wrapped up in future expectations. So I'd say the other posters are all correct, the best hope of success is to work on yourself and how you deal with the issues. Although we all hope our children live positive, fulfilling lives, there is nothing we can do to make that happen. I've found that the support from this site and like-minded parents helps keep me on track. [/QUOTE]
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