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"How can I screw my life up today?"
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<blockquote data-quote="Tanya M" data-source="post: 660123" data-attributes="member: 18516"><p>Hugs to you Lil and Jabber. You have gone into another chapter of "The Adventures of my Difficult Child"</p><p>It has actually helps me to look at my sons life as adventures - it somehow makes it less scary.</p><p></p><p>There is no understanding their choices and we can exhaust ourselves trying.</p><p></p><p>You did a very loving thing getting him a backpack, right down to the underwear. Some may look at as enabling but in this case I just look at as loving. You were honest with him, no sugar coating it. You could not have been any more clear in how you feel.</p><p></p><p>Now you just have to let go, let him live his life and you and Jabber go on with picking up the pieces of the last year and getting on with your own lives. As much as your heart is hurting there is a freedom that comes with the distance. The worry is still there but it's not as urgent and when the phone call or text comes that he needs help it's easier to say no when you are not in the same town.</p><p></p><p>It's just such an awful thing for us parents to go through. There are so many different scenarios that our Difficult Child live out and the chaos that follows but the common thread in it all is the pain and heartbreak they leave behind for us, the parents, the ones who love them the most.</p><p></p><p>What a blessing this site is where we can gather and share our hearts and the deep pain within them. Only other parents that have gone through what we have can understand what we feel.</p><p></p><p>Lil, I hope in the next few days you will be able to get some much needed rest and to start focusing on just you, ok maybe you can focus on Jabber too.<img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite2" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=";)" /></p><p></p><p>I wish you peace, love and calm.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tanya M, post: 660123, member: 18516"] Hugs to you Lil and Jabber. You have gone into another chapter of "The Adventures of my Difficult Child" It has actually helps me to look at my sons life as adventures - it somehow makes it less scary. There is no understanding their choices and we can exhaust ourselves trying. You did a very loving thing getting him a backpack, right down to the underwear. Some may look at as enabling but in this case I just look at as loving. You were honest with him, no sugar coating it. You could not have been any more clear in how you feel. Now you just have to let go, let him live his life and you and Jabber go on with picking up the pieces of the last year and getting on with your own lives. As much as your heart is hurting there is a freedom that comes with the distance. The worry is still there but it's not as urgent and when the phone call or text comes that he needs help it's easier to say no when you are not in the same town. It's just such an awful thing for us parents to go through. There are so many different scenarios that our Difficult Child live out and the chaos that follows but the common thread in it all is the pain and heartbreak they leave behind for us, the parents, the ones who love them the most. What a blessing this site is where we can gather and share our hearts and the deep pain within them. Only other parents that have gone through what we have can understand what we feel. Lil, I hope in the next few days you will be able to get some much needed rest and to start focusing on just you, ok maybe you can focus on Jabber too.;) I wish you peace, love and calm. [/QUOTE]
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