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<blockquote data-quote="firehorsewoman" data-source="post: 536323"><p>Hi, JJJ.</p><p></p><p>Answers to your questions:</p><p></p><p>When we first divorced four years ago we did something similar to what you suggest. I had easy child two days a week by herself, both kids three days, two days no kids. It was very hard on the kids. They did not like it. It was also very hard for me to maintain due to my work schedule. I work long and unpredictable hours and commute long distances. The ex works for himself and has lots of control of his schedule. The ex works down the street from where he lives and does not commute. The ex remarried right away. The ex has a VERY involved mother who is available to help with the kids on a daily basis in addition to the help his wife gives him. Therefore, after six months of divorce I decided to give him primary custody. Still, I get them about ten days a month.</p><p></p><p>difficult child gets straight A's in school. Works above grade level on all subjects. He has a 504 Plan at school which includes seating next to teacher, being allowed to stand in back of classroom and move his body when necessary, recently added special accommodations for testing in preparation for state testing next year in 3 rd grade-he has trouble with distractions and remaining focused during test/needs more time but gets 100% when he is allowed more time. Behavior problems at school have involved mostly talking too much and not following directions these are daily issues according to his behavior folder. Get's "N"s (needs improvement) on conduct stuff consistently. Has never gotten an "E" but sometimes gets an "S." He was sent to the Principal's office once this year for not listening to his PE coach and playing a "hitting" game with another student. Phone call from the school due to him making comment about his teacher's vagina. Has not had anger issues at school since Pre-school when he had MANY problems with anger. Seems to be able to control anger at school. Has problems with arguing with umpires during baseball though. </p><p></p><p>No mood stabilizers since they took him off Risperdal two years ago due to elevated Prolactin. Meltdowns were fewer and less intense on Risperdal. I ask at each doctor appointment (once per six weeks) if we can put him back on Risperdal or similar. But since his father has consistently said the behavior problems occur mostly at my house, there has been no support from the doctors or the ex regarding this. Since the divorce the ex has stuck to the "difficult child just has ADHD" story until just this week. They told us that Tenex would help stabilize his moods but we saw no difference regardless of the dose. </p><p></p><p>I think that answers your questions.</p><p></p><p>thanks for your help</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="firehorsewoman, post: 536323"] Hi, JJJ. Answers to your questions: When we first divorced four years ago we did something similar to what you suggest. I had easy child two days a week by herself, both kids three days, two days no kids. It was very hard on the kids. They did not like it. It was also very hard for me to maintain due to my work schedule. I work long and unpredictable hours and commute long distances. The ex works for himself and has lots of control of his schedule. The ex works down the street from where he lives and does not commute. The ex remarried right away. The ex has a VERY involved mother who is available to help with the kids on a daily basis in addition to the help his wife gives him. Therefore, after six months of divorce I decided to give him primary custody. Still, I get them about ten days a month. difficult child gets straight A's in school. Works above grade level on all subjects. He has a 504 Plan at school which includes seating next to teacher, being allowed to stand in back of classroom and move his body when necessary, recently added special accommodations for testing in preparation for state testing next year in 3 rd grade-he has trouble with distractions and remaining focused during test/needs more time but gets 100% when he is allowed more time. Behavior problems at school have involved mostly talking too much and not following directions these are daily issues according to his behavior folder. Get's "N"s (needs improvement) on conduct stuff consistently. Has never gotten an "E" but sometimes gets an "S." He was sent to the Principal's office once this year for not listening to his PE coach and playing a "hitting" game with another student. Phone call from the school due to him making comment about his teacher's vagina. Has not had anger issues at school since Pre-school when he had MANY problems with anger. Seems to be able to control anger at school. Has problems with arguing with umpires during baseball though. No mood stabilizers since they took him off Risperdal two years ago due to elevated Prolactin. Meltdowns were fewer and less intense on Risperdal. I ask at each doctor appointment (once per six weeks) if we can put him back on Risperdal or similar. But since his father has consistently said the behavior problems occur mostly at my house, there has been no support from the doctors or the ex regarding this. Since the divorce the ex has stuck to the "difficult child just has ADHD" story until just this week. They told us that Tenex would help stabilize his moods but we saw no difference regardless of the dose. I think that answers your questions. thanks for your help [/QUOTE]
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