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Parent Emeritus
How to detach when grandkids are involved.
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<blockquote data-quote="End of our rope" data-source="post: 632870" data-attributes="member: 17544"><p>Well upon so many making the recommendation we attended our first Al-Anon meeting. It just happened to be at our Church home. It was evident after the first couple of folks sharing we saw that we had certainly found the right group. Several shared their own frustrations with their difficult child's. We chose not to share with this group until we have attended another meeting or two. A lot of the sentiments I have read hear were echoed by this group.</p><p></p><p>It is clear to me that only I can come to the conclusion that I now have to settle for what this life is going to be not what we worked a lifetime for. My wife's father was an alcoholic and as a young teen she attended meetings and called this time in their lives the happiest. It didn't end well as he took his own life at the age of 42 with an overdose. I never experienced any of this with my family. I have earned what I have in this world by working harder than the next guy. When people would ask me "How did you know you could do that?" I would always answer " I didn't know I couldn't". Well everything I have ever done to try to resolve all of these issues with my difficult child were WRONG! They were never wrong for our GKIDS and I will continue to protect the innocents in all of this but in order to follow this program I must lay down the will fix this. </p><p></p><p>My wife told me tonight that I have to find a way to be happy in what this life is now. I am still too much hurt by the impact of my difficult child's actions and disregard for her family. I am angry, I want to lash out and that is not me and I don't know how to get past it.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="End of our rope, post: 632870, member: 17544"] Well upon so many making the recommendation we attended our first Al-Anon meeting. It just happened to be at our Church home. It was evident after the first couple of folks sharing we saw that we had certainly found the right group. Several shared their own frustrations with their difficult child's. We chose not to share with this group until we have attended another meeting or two. A lot of the sentiments I have read hear were echoed by this group. It is clear to me that only I can come to the conclusion that I now have to settle for what this life is going to be not what we worked a lifetime for. My wife's father was an alcoholic and as a young teen she attended meetings and called this time in their lives the happiest. It didn't end well as he took his own life at the age of 42 with an overdose. I never experienced any of this with my family. I have earned what I have in this world by working harder than the next guy. When people would ask me "How did you know you could do that?" I would always answer " I didn't know I couldn't". Well everything I have ever done to try to resolve all of these issues with my difficult child were WRONG! They were never wrong for our GKIDS and I will continue to protect the innocents in all of this but in order to follow this program I must lay down the will fix this. My wife told me tonight that I have to find a way to be happy in what this life is now. I am still too much hurt by the impact of my difficult child's actions and disregard for her family. I am angry, I want to lash out and that is not me and I don't know how to get past it. [/QUOTE]
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