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Parent Emeritus
How to detach when grandkids are involved.
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 632921" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Al-Anon saved my sanity and sometimes it still does. Nobody is abusing anything right now. Nobody is breaking the law. But when times are tough with difficult child 36 I still go to remind myself that I can not control him and I don't need to listen to his anger. If I listen, it is my decision.</p><p></p><p>I think physical work is a tremendous way to burn off stress. I like to run and work out. I do it to music. May sound dumb, but music always takes my mind off things because I'm running in time to the melody or whatever it is. When things were at their worst, I couldn't concentrate to read a book or watch a movie, but could always force myself to start running and always felt better once I got going. When I woke up in the middle of the night and couldn't sleep, I ran in the basement in my socks...lol. </p><p></p><p>I did not even state my name for about three meetings at Al-Anon. People seemed older than me too. I was in my 40's when I first started. Some people need it longer, some stick around to help the newcomers, and some never do learn to let go. The younger you are when you start, in my opinion the more hope there is that you can regain your own life. It becomes a self-destructive habit to rescue a grown child.</p><p></p><p>I'm really surprised and happy that you did go to a meeting. I thought you were not going to do anything to move forward. Even if you end up not liking Al-Anon, you did try something different. I think you WILL like it. Remember, age means wisdom (not always, but often).</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 632921, member: 1550"] Al-Anon saved my sanity and sometimes it still does. Nobody is abusing anything right now. Nobody is breaking the law. But when times are tough with difficult child 36 I still go to remind myself that I can not control him and I don't need to listen to his anger. If I listen, it is my decision. I think physical work is a tremendous way to burn off stress. I like to run and work out. I do it to music. May sound dumb, but music always takes my mind off things because I'm running in time to the melody or whatever it is. When things were at their worst, I couldn't concentrate to read a book or watch a movie, but could always force myself to start running and always felt better once I got going. When I woke up in the middle of the night and couldn't sleep, I ran in the basement in my socks...lol. I did not even state my name for about three meetings at Al-Anon. People seemed older than me too. I was in my 40's when I first started. Some people need it longer, some stick around to help the newcomers, and some never do learn to let go. The younger you are when you start, in my opinion the more hope there is that you can regain your own life. It becomes a self-destructive habit to rescue a grown child. I'm really surprised and happy that you did go to a meeting. I thought you were not going to do anything to move forward. Even if you end up not liking Al-Anon, you did try something different. I think you WILL like it. Remember, age means wisdom (not always, but often). [/QUOTE]
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How to detach when grandkids are involved.
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