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How to forgive a thief / son.
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<blockquote data-quote="Tanya M" data-source="post: 703853" data-attributes="member: 18516"><p>Hi Russell, I'm so sorry for what you are going through. </p><p></p><p>There is no other kind of betrayal like that of your own child stealing from you. My son has stolen from me many times and also done severe damage to my home which cost $$$$ to repair. New doors, drywall, counter tops, windows, carpeting, etc........</p><p>I carried a lot of anger in my heart towards my son. I read once "holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die"</p><p>I knew that I needed to let go of it and the only way I could do it was to forgive my son. Now, let me be clear, I have forgiven my son but that does not mean that I have forgotten all that he did, nor does it mean I trust him. Forgiveness was for me, not my son. </p><p>I would like to have a better relationship with my son but as long as he continues to live his life on the edge I have to be very careful to protect myself. It is because I don't trust my son that I have to protect myself. I will no longer put myself in a situation where my son will take advantage of me or try to manipulate me. I will no longer allow my son to use my emotions against me. It's all about keeping healthy boundaries. </p><p>This did not happen overnight for me. It took time and effort on my part. I purposefully focused on my life and filing it with things that made me happy. We the parents of these difficult adult children have our own lives to live. </p><p></p><p>I'm glad you found us here. Keep posting and let us know how things are going.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tanya M, post: 703853, member: 18516"] Hi Russell, I'm so sorry for what you are going through. There is no other kind of betrayal like that of your own child stealing from you. My son has stolen from me many times and also done severe damage to my home which cost $$$$ to repair. New doors, drywall, counter tops, windows, carpeting, etc........ I carried a lot of anger in my heart towards my son. I read once "holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die" I knew that I needed to let go of it and the only way I could do it was to forgive my son. Now, let me be clear, I have forgiven my son but that does not mean that I have forgotten all that he did, nor does it mean I trust him. Forgiveness was for me, not my son. I would like to have a better relationship with my son but as long as he continues to live his life on the edge I have to be very careful to protect myself. It is because I don't trust my son that I have to protect myself. I will no longer put myself in a situation where my son will take advantage of me or try to manipulate me. I will no longer allow my son to use my emotions against me. It's all about keeping healthy boundaries. This did not happen overnight for me. It took time and effort on my part. I purposefully focused on my life and filing it with things that made me happy. We the parents of these difficult adult children have our own lives to live. I'm glad you found us here. Keep posting and let us know how things are going. [/QUOTE]
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