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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 766094" data-attributes="member: 18958">Dear NomadI am sorry for the loss of your friend.I agree with you, that happiness is a choice. I trained my son to turn to me to solve his problems. Why? I couldn't bear his unhappiness and I felt it was my responsibility to fix him. I think this was a role I learned early in life in my family. I was the only one who could take responsibility and I could not survive the separation from them. It may have been true then, but it is not true now. Now, I am happy most of the time. And sadly, I do not let my son enter my space. I don't explicitly say that, but I don't invite him here and don't suggest that we meet. It just causes me despair. Even on his birthday, I did not suggest we meet. How painful.I wish with all my heart and soul this was different, but I accepted to continue this way was to give up my life.. I life is too much to pay. I don't know when this will change. I pray that it will someday. But I won't change. Never again will I pay with my life.</blockquote>

[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 766094, member: 18958"] Dear Nomad I am sorry for the loss of your friend. I agree with you, that happiness is a choice. I trained my son to turn to me to solve his problems. Why? I couldn't bear his unhappiness and I felt it was my responsibility to fix him. I think this was a role I learned early in life in my family. I was the only one who could take responsibility and I could not survive the separation from them. It may have been true then, but it is not true now. Now, I am happy most of the time. And sadly, I do not let my son enter my space. I don't explicitly say that, but I don't invite him here and don't suggest that we meet. It just causes me despair. Even on his birthday, I did not suggest we meet. How painful. I wish with all my heart and soul this was different, but I accepted to continue this way was to give up my life.. I life is too much to pay. I don't know when this will change. I pray that it will someday. But I won't change. Never again will I pay with my life. [/QUOTE]

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