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I can't do this....
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 692198" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>dtsc this is such a fresh idea and I like it! They live at home but care for their own needs and only reside in part of the house. They can make a mess, but not in your space. They are basically treated as if they live elsewhere. I think it's a good way to both leave one another alone and teach them that if they don't change the bedding or do the laundry...it stays dirty.</p><p></p><p>The only change I'd make in this solution is that they pay something.</p><p></p><p>I don't think that everyone will embrace this idea, but I do! The fact is, the more we do the little but important things, such as laundry, the less they learn to be adults.</p><p></p><p>I believe strongly that the boy has something off about him...possibly depression or a form of autism that impedes him. You can't discount genetics and bio. Dad committed suicide. A suicidal parent puts the offspring at higher risk. This is documented.</p><p></p><p>I believe an assessment and treatment would help him, but if he won't go he won't. We cannot make them do anything. They have to decide to do it, like Child of Mines boy did...living on his own and working hard. We can't do anything to force it.</p><p></p><p>We can certainly curtail what they say to us if they are financially dependent on us, but that doesn't alter what it is in their minds. That's the important issue. That's where dangerous thinking lurks...where we can't see it. It doesn't go away just because the person feels he must not say certain things out loud.</p><p></p><p>I would rather hear it so I had a real feel for how my child thought...if he/she were rational, happy, sad, suicidal. I'd want to at least be prepared. For whatever.</p><p></p><p>Therapists saved my life. Period. I'd be a suicide statistic without help.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 692198, member: 1550"] dtsc this is such a fresh idea and I like it! They live at home but care for their own needs and only reside in part of the house. They can make a mess, but not in your space. They are basically treated as if they live elsewhere. I think it's a good way to both leave one another alone and teach them that if they don't change the bedding or do the laundry...it stays dirty. The only change I'd make in this solution is that they pay something. I don't think that everyone will embrace this idea, but I do! The fact is, the more we do the little but important things, such as laundry, the less they learn to be adults. I believe strongly that the boy has something off about him...possibly depression or a form of autism that impedes him. You can't discount genetics and bio. Dad committed suicide. A suicidal parent puts the offspring at higher risk. This is documented. I believe an assessment and treatment would help him, but if he won't go he won't. We cannot make them do anything. They have to decide to do it, like Child of Mines boy did...living on his own and working hard. We can't do anything to force it. We can certainly curtail what they say to us if they are financially dependent on us, but that doesn't alter what it is in their minds. That's the important issue. That's where dangerous thinking lurks...where we can't see it. It doesn't go away just because the person feels he must not say certain things out loud. I would rather hear it so I had a real feel for how my child thought...if he/she were rational, happy, sad, suicidal. I'd want to at least be prepared. For whatever. Therapists saved my life. Period. I'd be a suicide statistic without help. [/QUOTE]
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