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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 692707" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>I agree with TheWalrus. </p><p></p><p>From my experience who will change, is Lil. Lil. You will tire. You feel sick and tired now. But a day will come when you cannot do more and you will cut him lose. You will want to cut him lose. Irregardless of what <em>might</em> happen to him. </p><p>Because even with normal average kids, there is risk. And most parents have the same ambivalence about it when they leave. But they do, the children they do leave.When that moment comes, it will not be hard. It will be the only thing you can and want to do. I believe that. Because it happened to me.</p><p>I agree with this. Like with TheWalrus my son sought out safe other places. He wanted to continue living in a safe environment with decent people. Even when he was homeless his standards did not fail him. He found decent people, usually, with whom to associate. Vulnerable people probably like he is.</p><p></p><p>This causes me a lot of pain to type, remembering--causes me pain because acknowledging it is painful. How much we have all been through here. Us and our kids.</p><p>To conclude, this transition while it seems about the child is really about the mother. </p><p></p><p>What does she need to do, <em>for herself</em>, in order to reach the point where she knows she needs to and wants to cut that nest. Our children require it. Each of us must reach the point where we require it too.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 692707, member: 18958"] I agree with TheWalrus. From my experience who will change, is Lil. Lil. You will tire. You feel sick and tired now. But a day will come when you cannot do more and you will cut him lose. You will want to cut him lose. Irregardless of what [I]might[/I] happen to him. Because even with normal average kids, there is risk. And most parents have the same ambivalence about it when they leave. But they do, the children they do leave.When that moment comes, it will not be hard. It will be the only thing you can and want to do. I believe that. Because it happened to me. I agree with this. Like with TheWalrus my son sought out safe other places. He wanted to continue living in a safe environment with decent people. Even when he was homeless his standards did not fail him. He found decent people, usually, with whom to associate. Vulnerable people probably like he is. This causes me a lot of pain to type, remembering--causes me pain because acknowledging it is painful. How much we have all been through here. Us and our kids. To conclude, this transition while it seems about the child is really about the mother. What does she need to do, [I]for herself[/I], in order to reach the point where she knows she needs to and wants to cut that nest. Our children require it. Each of us must reach the point where we require it too. [/QUOTE]
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