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I can't do this....
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<blockquote data-quote="Lil" data-source="post: 693105" data-attributes="member: 17309"><p>Well, maybe someone up above was listening.</p><p></p><p>It went better than ever expected. So well that Jabber and I are a little antsy about it, in fact.</p><p></p><p>We explained a bit about why we aren't willing to spend the $400 on the rent unless he has a job. That said, we explained the option of staying here and the conditions. </p><p></p><p>He was very agreeable. </p><p></p><p>We led with him calling me and upsetting me at work. We then talked about his deadline for finding work, and discussed maybe finding a job coach or something to help him. We went over the pot and how it's holding him back from finding a job...he knows this...we did not, at this time, make drug testing a requirement. We talked about him giving us his money to hold, he said he'd be happy with $100 every two weeks as his money to blow. Depending on what he receives, that's reasonable IF he is earning enough. </p><p></p><p>Then we got into counseling. He was okay with it, but said the counselor didn't understand why he needed it...he seemed fine to her. Uh huh. So then I talked about how some people need help because they are differently wired and that maybe he should consider an evaluation to see if he has some disorder that affects his way of thinking. That we see a progression of A, B, and then C, but maybe he doesn't think that way and he needs to find a different way to get to C from A without going thru B. </p><p></p><p>He agreed. He said he'd go if we made an appointment for the evaluation. He's not sure that it will help him...he made some remark about everyone else needing to understand HIM, not him needing to understand himself...but I pointed out that if he understood how his wiring is different than other peoples, then he could explain it if necessary. </p><p></p><p>So there were a few other things discussed of course and he still has the option of the apartment if he gets a job by Monday...but I hope he doesn't take it for all the reasons we told him. I think that apartment would be setting himself up for failure, especially since J would promptly move in. </p><p></p><p>In the end, we ate pizza, I took him to K's house (yeah, J is there...I'm starting to hate him) and he may or may not need a ride back. I think until Monday the 4th, when we know what option he has chosen, we'll just do things as we have been. </p><p></p><p>And as always, we'll see.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lil, post: 693105, member: 17309"] Well, maybe someone up above was listening. It went better than ever expected. So well that Jabber and I are a little antsy about it, in fact. We explained a bit about why we aren't willing to spend the $400 on the rent unless he has a job. That said, we explained the option of staying here and the conditions. He was very agreeable. We led with him calling me and upsetting me at work. We then talked about his deadline for finding work, and discussed maybe finding a job coach or something to help him. We went over the pot and how it's holding him back from finding a job...he knows this...we did not, at this time, make drug testing a requirement. We talked about him giving us his money to hold, he said he'd be happy with $100 every two weeks as his money to blow. Depending on what he receives, that's reasonable IF he is earning enough. Then we got into counseling. He was okay with it, but said the counselor didn't understand why he needed it...he seemed fine to her. Uh huh. So then I talked about how some people need help because they are differently wired and that maybe he should consider an evaluation to see if he has some disorder that affects his way of thinking. That we see a progression of A, B, and then C, but maybe he doesn't think that way and he needs to find a different way to get to C from A without going thru B. He agreed. He said he'd go if we made an appointment for the evaluation. He's not sure that it will help him...he made some remark about everyone else needing to understand HIM, not him needing to understand himself...but I pointed out that if he understood how his wiring is different than other peoples, then he could explain it if necessary. So there were a few other things discussed of course and he still has the option of the apartment if he gets a job by Monday...but I hope he doesn't take it for all the reasons we told him. I think that apartment would be setting himself up for failure, especially since J would promptly move in. In the end, we ate pizza, I took him to K's house (yeah, J is there...I'm starting to hate him) and he may or may not need a ride back. I think until Monday the 4th, when we know what option he has chosen, we'll just do things as we have been. And as always, we'll see. [/QUOTE]
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