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<blockquote data-quote="SuZir" data-source="post: 588841" data-attributes="member: 14557"><p>I hope you didn't understand me wrong. I wasn't trying to imply in any way, that her issues would be your fault or that you would not be willing to do your part of the work. Not at all. And I better mention English is not my first language, so my 'between the lines' can be something I didn't mean at times (along with all the grammar mistakes.)</p><p></p><p>To me it sounds that your daughter does have something neurological going on too. Her impulse control may be an issue, reading social cues and understanding other person's point of view too. But also your earlier deploiments and of course your husband's current illness are major stressors for your whole family, also her. And that can cause it's own issues. Especially with possible neurological issues. You need to get her evaluated for neurological side, but also do take any help for psychological side that you can get and that seems to help.</p><p></p><p>And yeah, you will have to work on family dynamics, parenting and all that. In the end, doesn't really matter are you willing are not, you can't really return her to where she came <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite2" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=";)" /> As unfair as it is, our difficult children require us to go extra mile in parenting and working for our parenting skills. I'm far from perfect parent. My parenting successes are few and far between and my laundry list of 'what not to do' is long and stems from bitter experience. Still if I had only my easy child, I could easily imagine I'm quite good in this parenting business. He is one of those kids who are almost impossible to ruin with parenting. With difficult child though, let's just say that it wasn't one extra mile, but more like few times around the globe.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SuZir, post: 588841, member: 14557"] I hope you didn't understand me wrong. I wasn't trying to imply in any way, that her issues would be your fault or that you would not be willing to do your part of the work. Not at all. And I better mention English is not my first language, so my 'between the lines' can be something I didn't mean at times (along with all the grammar mistakes.) To me it sounds that your daughter does have something neurological going on too. Her impulse control may be an issue, reading social cues and understanding other person's point of view too. But also your earlier deploiments and of course your husband's current illness are major stressors for your whole family, also her. And that can cause it's own issues. Especially with possible neurological issues. You need to get her evaluated for neurological side, but also do take any help for psychological side that you can get and that seems to help. And yeah, you will have to work on family dynamics, parenting and all that. In the end, doesn't really matter are you willing are not, you can't really return her to where she came :winking: As unfair as it is, our difficult children require us to go extra mile in parenting and working for our parenting skills. I'm far from perfect parent. My parenting successes are few and far between and my laundry list of 'what not to do' is long and stems from bitter experience. Still if I had only my easy child, I could easily imagine I'm quite good in this parenting business. He is one of those kids who are almost impossible to ruin with parenting. With difficult child though, let's just say that it wasn't one extra mile, but more like few times around the globe. [/QUOTE]
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