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Substance Abuse
I feel to blame
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<blockquote data-quote="Lost in sadness" data-source="post: 726755" data-attributes="member: 21056"><p>SWOT think you for replying. Everything feels weird, I cannot seem to shake this gloomy feeling. I feel obsessed by it. Can smoking weed really do this to someone? Ruin their whole life!? He has spent hundreds of pounds on what? I feel tormented by what a couple of his exes said to me once, they had ganged up on him about something and I politely asked them to leave him alone, and one said "its your fault anyway, he wouldn't be mental if you hadn't of thrown him out, he was fine before that"! i was so hurt and felt I needed to explain that if he hadn't of smoked weed and behaved so badly then we wouldn't have thrown him out. I now cannot get that out of my head, its as if I am considering it could be different if I had allowed him to stay at home. I am just so sad. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite3" alt=":(" title="Frown :(" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":(" /></p><p></p><p>GuidanceSeeker, I am so pleased to hear about your son, I did think about you yesterday as I remembered it was Friday he got to move in. I did read about the bar bill too. Sorry. Been there too. My son did claim benefits for a bit but never bothered to go to the sign ons so it got stopped. I have told him that if he doesn't intend to work he will need to sign on and claim housing benefit as I am not going to keep paying his rent. Months ago he said he would never sign on again but he was working then and things looked on the up. We are now back to square one although this time there is no council to fall back on and house him in a hostel because he ran up £1400 rent arrears in the last one as he refused to pay for a sh*t hole as he put it! His view was he was the only one working there whilst the others dosed around smoking weed and he had to pay 75 percent of his wages in rent whilst they got it for free. He felt that it was not helping people better themselves so he stopped paying. I kind of agreed but told him just do it to get on the next step. In the end I found this house share.There will be nothing this time. He just does not seem to get it. He just does what he wants. I have messaged him to say this is the final two weeks. No reply. I feel like a prisoner in my own head. Thank you for being there. xx</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lost in sadness, post: 726755, member: 21056"] SWOT think you for replying. Everything feels weird, I cannot seem to shake this gloomy feeling. I feel obsessed by it. Can smoking weed really do this to someone? Ruin their whole life!? He has spent hundreds of pounds on what? I feel tormented by what a couple of his exes said to me once, they had ganged up on him about something and I politely asked them to leave him alone, and one said "its your fault anyway, he wouldn't be mental if you hadn't of thrown him out, he was fine before that"! i was so hurt and felt I needed to explain that if he hadn't of smoked weed and behaved so badly then we wouldn't have thrown him out. I now cannot get that out of my head, its as if I am considering it could be different if I had allowed him to stay at home. I am just so sad. :( GuidanceSeeker, I am so pleased to hear about your son, I did think about you yesterday as I remembered it was Friday he got to move in. I did read about the bar bill too. Sorry. Been there too. My son did claim benefits for a bit but never bothered to go to the sign ons so it got stopped. I have told him that if he doesn't intend to work he will need to sign on and claim housing benefit as I am not going to keep paying his rent. Months ago he said he would never sign on again but he was working then and things looked on the up. We are now back to square one although this time there is no council to fall back on and house him in a hostel because he ran up £1400 rent arrears in the last one as he refused to pay for a sh*t hole as he put it! His view was he was the only one working there whilst the others dosed around smoking weed and he had to pay 75 percent of his wages in rent whilst they got it for free. He felt that it was not helping people better themselves so he stopped paying. I kind of agreed but told him just do it to get on the next step. In the end I found this house share.There will be nothing this time. He just does not seem to get it. He just does what he wants. I have messaged him to say this is the final two weeks. No reply. I feel like a prisoner in my own head. Thank you for being there. xx [/QUOTE]
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