Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
I give up. It hurts too much to hope.
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 662126" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Nomad, I am curious how you got this status, for your husband to be payee.</p><p>.</p><p>Six months ago or so my son went to Social Security. I went with him. He stated this: I want my Mother to be my payee. I am not managing my money well. I lose my debit cards month after month and am without money to live.</p><p></p><p>It was a supervisor and she said no. She told him that their preference was that recipients manage and control their own money. Even though she looked on the computer and she was able to verify that what my son said was true. He had requested to be reissued new debit cards month after month because he had lost them.</p><p></p><p>I read on the Social Security website something like the following: If you believe a recipient is not managing their payment sufficiently well, to have housing and food and other necessities, please notify Social Security by calling this number.</p><p></p><p>Yesterday I called. I told the Rep my son is being preyed upon for his check. He gives people a huge amount of his check to sleep on a couch. He does not have a key. He has no tenants rights. He is thrown out after a few days, a week. This is happening week after week. Month after month.</p><p></p><p>She refused to help me. Again she said, we want them to handle their own money. They are adults. They have that right.</p><p></p><p>She told me if I was concerned why not have him move home with me.</p><p></p><p>There is something wrong here, and I do not understand what it is.</p><p></p><p>My son has no idea of how to manage money. He has no idea how to protect himself against people who want to harm him. Except after the fact. Through anger and conflict.</p><p></p><p>The last night he was here with us, he saw a package of Smoked Salmon in my freezer. He knew he wanted it all. Mom, how much did you pay for that package of Lox? $20 I think. Can I pay you $10 for it?</p><p></p><p>NO. We bought that as a delicacy, to eat a little bit at a time. Have some if you wish. If I am not in a position to pay for and eat a package of Smoked Salmon in a sitting you are not either.</p><p></p><p>I know I overreacted. I do not think he understood one word. He knew only that in that moment he wanted it, he had the money in his pocket. </p><p></p><p>That is how my son relates to money.</p><p></p><p>I told the Social Security person this: So the policy is to permit recipients to over and over again hurt themselves or permit others to hurt them, repeatedly? That is what I am hearing. Is there another way to understand this?</p><p></p><p>Oh, no. That's not it.</p><p></p><p>Thank you for your help.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 662126, member: 18958"] Nomad, I am curious how you got this status, for your husband to be payee. . Six months ago or so my son went to Social Security. I went with him. He stated this: I want my Mother to be my payee. I am not managing my money well. I lose my debit cards month after month and am without money to live. It was a supervisor and she said no. She told him that their preference was that recipients manage and control their own money. Even though she looked on the computer and she was able to verify that what my son said was true. He had requested to be reissued new debit cards month after month because he had lost them. I read on the Social Security website something like the following: If you believe a recipient is not managing their payment sufficiently well, to have housing and food and other necessities, please notify Social Security by calling this number. Yesterday I called. I told the Rep my son is being preyed upon for his check. He gives people a huge amount of his check to sleep on a couch. He does not have a key. He has no tenants rights. He is thrown out after a few days, a week. This is happening week after week. Month after month. She refused to help me. Again she said, we want them to handle their own money. They are adults. They have that right. She told me if I was concerned why not have him move home with me. There is something wrong here, and I do not understand what it is. My son has no idea of how to manage money. He has no idea how to protect himself against people who want to harm him. Except after the fact. Through anger and conflict. The last night he was here with us, he saw a package of Smoked Salmon in my freezer. He knew he wanted it all. Mom, how much did you pay for that package of Lox? $20 I think. Can I pay you $10 for it? NO. We bought that as a delicacy, to eat a little bit at a time. Have some if you wish. If I am not in a position to pay for and eat a package of Smoked Salmon in a sitting you are not either. I know I overreacted. I do not think he understood one word. He knew only that in that moment he wanted it, he had the money in his pocket. That is how my son relates to money. I told the Social Security person this: So the policy is to permit recipients to over and over again hurt themselves or permit others to hurt them, repeatedly? That is what I am hearing. Is there another way to understand this? Oh, no. That's not it. Thank you for your help. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
I give up. It hurts too much to hope.
Top