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General Parenting
I guess meanness can be a reaction to knowing you are different and a disappointment
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<blockquote data-quote="PiscesMom" data-source="post: 716057" data-attributes="member: 19889"><p>Yeah...I learn a lot, and it is nice to be around other people who have seen their dreams die. But also, it did make me think of him more, which is maybe a kind of bad for me. I don't know. I have an anxiety disorder myself, so I have to be careful. </p><p> It is so easy for me to get caught up in How can I save him? I am the only parent there that has a child with conduct disorder. Everyone else, its depression, schizophrenia, etc. Nobody is afraid of their child, not like I am. And they are all relatively treatment compliant. My son is not. Your stepson sounds like my son, yes. My son has terribly low self esteem, and I guess it is expressed by him hating on almost everyone - every minority group, anyone who is not straight, etc, etc. </p><p>I wonder if I am trying to see him thru the prism of mental illness - maybe he is not mentally ill, just kind of different, and not a very nice person? I don't know. </p><p>Bad hand genetically, plus stressors, the same. </p><p>Does he live with you? Do you "let go"? My therapist says he's safe, and asked me how you can help someone who doesn't want to be helped. He lives with his dad. If his dad dies, do I say you can't live here? He can't really fend for himself. Maybe I shouldn't even think about that, since his dad fine.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="PiscesMom, post: 716057, member: 19889"] Yeah...I learn a lot, and it is nice to be around other people who have seen their dreams die. But also, it did make me think of him more, which is maybe a kind of bad for me. I don't know. I have an anxiety disorder myself, so I have to be careful. It is so easy for me to get caught up in How can I save him? I am the only parent there that has a child with conduct disorder. Everyone else, its depression, schizophrenia, etc. Nobody is afraid of their child, not like I am. And they are all relatively treatment compliant. My son is not. Your stepson sounds like my son, yes. My son has terribly low self esteem, and I guess it is expressed by him hating on almost everyone - every minority group, anyone who is not straight, etc, etc. I wonder if I am trying to see him thru the prism of mental illness - maybe he is not mentally ill, just kind of different, and not a very nice person? I don't know. Bad hand genetically, plus stressors, the same. Does he live with you? Do you "let go"? My therapist says he's safe, and asked me how you can help someone who doesn't want to be helped. He lives with his dad. If his dad dies, do I say you can't live here? He can't really fend for himself. Maybe I shouldn't even think about that, since his dad fine. [/QUOTE]
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I guess meanness can be a reaction to knowing you are different and a disappointment
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