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Substance Abuse
I just threw out my 21 year old addict son
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<blockquote data-quote="Kathy813" data-source="post: 703222" data-attributes="member: 1967"><p>That is straight out of the addict handbook. It is always someone else's fault.</p><p></p><p>I think that you did the right thing. He made his choice by breaking your rules. Now it is up to him to figure things out. Don't let him engage you . . . it is a power struggle that you can't win. He will keep upping the ante.</p><p></p><p>There is something in dog training called extinction training. A dog will keep up unwanted behavior and will get frantic if it doesn't get what it wants. For example, the dog might keep jumping up on your legs to get picked up.</p><p>If a bid for attention has been successful in the past, and now fails, a dog may up the ante before giving up. A dog who is no longer rewarded for jumping may, before ceasing the behavior, increases its intensity by jumping more frantically and/or mouthing at the person. If the person continues to ignore the behavior, it will stop. It is called an extinction burst.</p><p></p><p>Addicts do the same thing. They will up the ante as they get more and more desperate for money and drugs. You need to stay strong. Eventually they will stop asking when they realize that you mean it.</p><p></p><p>I had to take a break from my daughter when she was at her worst. I blocked her calls and texts and deleted her emails. She finally stopped calling and asking for money because she realized it wouldn't work any more.</p><p></p><p>I am so sorry that you are going through this. </p><p></p><p>~Kathy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Kathy813, post: 703222, member: 1967"] That is straight out of the addict handbook. It is always someone else's fault. I think that you did the right thing. He made his choice by breaking your rules. Now it is up to him to figure things out. Don't let him engage you . . . it is a power struggle that you can't win. He will keep upping the ante. There is something in dog training called extinction training. A dog will keep up unwanted behavior and will get frantic if it doesn't get what it wants. For example, the dog might keep jumping up on your legs to get picked up. If a bid for attention has been successful in the past, and now fails, a dog may up the ante before giving up. A dog who is no longer rewarded for jumping may, before ceasing the behavior, increases its intensity by jumping more frantically and/or mouthing at the person. If the person continues to ignore the behavior, it will stop. It is called an extinction burst. Addicts do the same thing. They will up the ante as they get more and more desperate for money and drugs. You need to stay strong. Eventually they will stop asking when they realize that you mean it. I had to take a break from my daughter when she was at her worst. I blocked her calls and texts and deleted her emails. She finally stopped calling and asking for money because she realized it wouldn't work any more. I am so sorry that you are going through this. ~Kathy [/QUOTE]
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I just threw out my 21 year old addict son
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