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Family of Origin
I Love a Narcissist. Now What?
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 677172" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Hi Quicksand,</p><p></p><p>I am just seeing now your new post which woke up this thread. I am glad you are back.</p><p></p><p>Say hi for us to UAW and give him my regards. (Perhaps not. Remember I asked if he was available?)</p><p></p><p>I agree with Cedar. If you can do it I think I would call your Mom, with one caveat.</p><p></p><p>Is she triangulating? I mean, is UAW included in this reaching out by her? I would be curious about why not, if he is not. That would not be correct. He is a child, too. Her child. These old patterns live on. I would not participate in his exclusion.</p><p></p><p>If you do call I would say something upfront, from the start like, I am here in California visiting UAW. I am calling for us both, sending love. That way any triangulation by her is diffused.</p><p></p><p>You are calling <em>for you</em>, if you decide to call. As Cedar says, so you can look at yourself in the mirror. She may not deserve it but you do. You deserve to be the best <em>you</em> you can be. You are brave and strong. You are coming from self-respect and hope. The belief in change. Your own. Whether or not she changes, you can. Remember forgiveness does not necessarily entail reconciliation. It is the letting go of corrosive feelings in oneself. You deserve that.</p><p></p><p>If you can I would try to call from that place. The very strong decision in yourself to be the best you. To let go of fear. It is not to forget. It is not to abandon yourself.</p><p></p><p>Keep posting. We have missed you. Welcome back.</p><p></p><p>COPA</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 677172, member: 18958"] Hi Quicksand, I am just seeing now your new post which woke up this thread. I am glad you are back. Say hi for us to UAW and give him my regards. (Perhaps not. Remember I asked if he was available?) I agree with Cedar. If you can do it I think I would call your Mom, with one caveat. Is she triangulating? I mean, is UAW included in this reaching out by her? I would be curious about why not, if he is not. That would not be correct. He is a child, too. Her child. These old patterns live on. I would not participate in his exclusion. If you do call I would say something upfront, from the start like, I am here in California visiting UAW. I am calling for us both, sending love. That way any triangulation by her is diffused. You are calling [I]for you[/I], if you decide to call. As Cedar says, so you can look at yourself in the mirror. She may not deserve it but you do. You deserve to be the best [I]you[/I] you can be. You are brave and strong. You are coming from self-respect and hope. The belief in change. Your own. Whether or not she changes, you can. Remember forgiveness does not necessarily entail reconciliation. It is the letting go of corrosive feelings in oneself. You deserve that. If you can I would try to call from that place. The very strong decision in yourself to be the best you. To let go of fear. It is not to forget. It is not to abandon yourself. Keep posting. We have missed you. Welcome back. COPA [/QUOTE]
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I Love a Narcissist. Now What?
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