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So sorry that you had to hear her talk that way but its good that the staff heard it and are seeing what really goes on.  At age 9, my daughter told me that she wished someone would murder me so that I would be dead...this was over losing the privileges to play with her Barbies because she was rude to someone else.  She's also one that is never at fault..its always the fault of someone else and I think she truly believes it.  Anyway, sending thoughts and prayers out to you and you all work on the giant mounds of paperwork and hoping she'll get a very throrough evaluation. and that it will answer some questions for you all.