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Message: <blockquote data-quote="sadandfrustrated" data-source="post: 671048" data-attributes="member: 19612">How do I feel?   hmm.  That's a tricky question.   My heart aches from missing my son and I want him back but it's not at the forefront of my mind anymore.  My son's been gone a long time.... long before I threw him out the door and I think that realization has left me with a certain acceptance and resignation.  Oddly enough, there's an element of peace that comes with letting him go. I do not miss the unfeeling carcass of my son that lived here.  The energy in the house is much calmer.  I'm calmer.  My 12 yr. old incredibly intuitive grandson asked me why I was in such a good mood lately.  I didn't realize I was.  I think he senses the lightness in me.  I'm doing ok.</blockquote>