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<blockquote data-quote="New Leaf" data-source="post: 671501" data-attributes="member: 19522"><p>Thank you ksm and daze. Yes I did write the poems, it is a part of me that just kind of comes out.....</p><p>In my struggle to find peace in the difficulty of dealing with all of this, there are times when there is an emptiness.</p><p>I have my faith, work and activities.</p><p>Yet there are moments when the joy mixed with the pain of memories come flooding in, there is a despair in not knowing how the ones I love are faring, the uncertainty, the searching for answers. Sometimes there are no answers, just the real, raw, undeniable truth of it all.</p><p>This is when my faith and resolve are put to the test.</p><p>So, I have to remind myself to look up. To keep my head up and keep on going.</p><p>I have to remind myself that no matter what I have done, or what I do, the reality, is that each of my children have to take responsibility for their decisions and choices and live their lives.</p><p>I have to remember that I need to take time for me, to yes,</p><p>break down under the weight of it all and then to look up,</p><p>to rebuild.</p><p>We here, are all faced with the impossible.</p><p>The struggle.</p><p>Each and every one of us has a situation that is unique.</p><p>There are times, when it is so frustrating.</p><p>I am so very thankful to have this place to come to and see the strength in the souls that are here.</p><p>As I walk through this journey, I am thankful to have faith in a higher power.</p><p>So when it seems there is no end to the sadness,</p><p>I can look up.</p><p>It is hard, at times.</p><p>In the end all,</p><p>it is up to me to build my future, to live my life.</p><p>I have no control over what my d cs choose.</p><p>I have to learn how to fill the emptiness of it all.</p><p>To stop feeling as my d cs would have me feel, that I gave up.</p><p>The line in the song-</p><p>I've got to learn what I've got, what I'm not, and who I am</p><p>is so simple, but rings true for me.</p><p>I've got to learn what I've got, what I'm not, and who I am.</p><p>To pick myself up by the bootstraps and see what this is for what it is-</p><p>another passage in life in all of its complexities.</p><p>In the end of it all, when I am able to look back in retrospect,</p><p>how I responded and traveled my path, my faith is the thing I've got.</p><p>What I am not, is-</p><p>I am not in control over how others act,</p><p>including my d cs.</p><p>Who I am? I am still finding that out.</p><p></p><p>The song is very beautiful, isn't it? There is such hope in it. It reminds me, in the throes of it all</p><p>that my d cs in all of the craziness, are searching for who they are. If I keep picking up the pieces for them, how will they learn to rely on themselves? How will they learn what they've got, who they are not, and who they are? How will they learn "how to bend, without the world, caving in?"</p><p></p><p>I am very grateful to be able to come to CD and share, and see the light and incredible strength and grace of folks who are here.</p><p></p><p>How do we all do it? One day at a time, one step at a time.</p><p>Good day to you folks, in the difficulties of your lives, I hope that you find peace within, and time to look up.</p><p>leafy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="New Leaf, post: 671501, member: 19522"] Thank you ksm and daze. Yes I did write the poems, it is a part of me that just kind of comes out..... In my struggle to find peace in the difficulty of dealing with all of this, there are times when there is an emptiness. I have my faith, work and activities. Yet there are moments when the joy mixed with the pain of memories come flooding in, there is a despair in not knowing how the ones I love are faring, the uncertainty, the searching for answers. Sometimes there are no answers, just the real, raw, undeniable truth of it all. This is when my faith and resolve are put to the test. So, I have to remind myself to look up. To keep my head up and keep on going. I have to remind myself that no matter what I have done, or what I do, the reality, is that each of my children have to take responsibility for their decisions and choices and live their lives. I have to remember that I need to take time for me, to yes, break down under the weight of it all and then to look up, to rebuild. We here, are all faced with the impossible. The struggle. Each and every one of us has a situation that is unique. There are times, when it is so frustrating. I am so very thankful to have this place to come to and see the strength in the souls that are here. As I walk through this journey, I am thankful to have faith in a higher power. So when it seems there is no end to the sadness, I can look up. It is hard, at times. In the end all, it is up to me to build my future, to live my life. I have no control over what my d cs choose. I have to learn how to fill the emptiness of it all. To stop feeling as my d cs would have me feel, that I gave up. The line in the song- I've got to learn what I've got, what I'm not, and who I am is so simple, but rings true for me. I've got to learn what I've got, what I'm not, and who I am. To pick myself up by the bootstraps and see what this is for what it is- another passage in life in all of its complexities. In the end of it all, when I am able to look back in retrospect, how I responded and traveled my path, my faith is the thing I've got. What I am not, is- I am not in control over how others act, including my d cs. Who I am? I am still finding that out. The song is very beautiful, isn't it? There is such hope in it. It reminds me, in the throes of it all that my d cs in all of the craziness, are searching for who they are. If I keep picking up the pieces for them, how will they learn to rely on themselves? How will they learn what they've got, who they are not, and who they are? How will they learn "how to bend, without the world, caving in?" I am very grateful to be able to come to CD and share, and see the light and incredible strength and grace of folks who are here. How do we all do it? One day at a time, one step at a time. Good day to you folks, in the difficulties of your lives, I hope that you find peace within, and time to look up. leafy [/QUOTE]
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