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Parent Emeritus
If it’s not one kid, it’s the other.
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<blockquote data-quote="overcome mom" data-source="post: 739643" data-attributes="member: 23328"><p>I can't believe how much reading this site is a help. Elsi I laughed after I read your description of your daughter and her job. It is <u>exactly </u>what my son says. The longest he has kept a job is 6 weeks and he had 7 jobs last year. He never got fired once because of something he did. Well he might of made a little mistake but not enough to get fired.</p><p>Tanya - I have never told any of my friends this but we too don't tell my son when we have bought something and don't announce when we are on vacation if I can help it. We have had a travel trailer for a year now and he doesn't know. Never stays at the house long enough to see it and when I tell him we are camping he never ask for ANY details only wants to tell us why he needs money and what his most recent crisis is.</p><p>He says he is willing to work hard but things just happen to him. Still hasn't figured out it's him, his behavior. He says- I just don't get it. The fact that I was on my own at 18 and supported myself since then, through college, without anyone's or the government's help it still doesn't count. That's was a long time ago and things are more expensive now. What I don't get his addiction and lack of delayed gratification. </p><p>I have started to really stick to my guns about the money. He called a couple times a few days ago and I did not answer. He never left a message or text and hasn't called since. I hate to say it but I hope this last for a while, it really reduces my stress. I still tense up when my phone goes off . I have found some freedom realizing that I don't have to answer my phone. It is a good idea to have him text me instead of talking. He hates that as it is harder to manipulate me with a text. The other day I told him not to call if he needed money for a bunch of his usual excuses and he text back -Well that's cold. I thought about texting him back how cold it is to lie to me on a continual basis to get money, yell at me and take money when he doesn't work for it.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="overcome mom, post: 739643, member: 23328"] I can't believe how much reading this site is a help. Elsi I laughed after I read your description of your daughter and her job. It is [U]exactly [/U]what my son says. The longest he has kept a job is 6 weeks and he had 7 jobs last year. He never got fired once because of something he did. Well he might of made a little mistake but not enough to get fired. Tanya - I have never told any of my friends this but we too don't tell my son when we have bought something and don't announce when we are on vacation if I can help it. We have had a travel trailer for a year now and he doesn't know. Never stays at the house long enough to see it and when I tell him we are camping he never ask for ANY details only wants to tell us why he needs money and what his most recent crisis is. He says he is willing to work hard but things just happen to him. Still hasn't figured out it's him, his behavior. He says- I just don't get it. The fact that I was on my own at 18 and supported myself since then, through college, without anyone's or the government's help it still doesn't count. That's was a long time ago and things are more expensive now. What I don't get his addiction and lack of delayed gratification. I have started to really stick to my guns about the money. He called a couple times a few days ago and I did not answer. He never left a message or text and hasn't called since. I hate to say it but I hope this last for a while, it really reduces my stress. I still tense up when my phone goes off . I have found some freedom realizing that I don't have to answer my phone. It is a good idea to have him text me instead of talking. He hates that as it is harder to manipulate me with a text. The other day I told him not to call if he needed money for a bunch of his usual excuses and he text back -Well that's cold. I thought about texting him back how cold it is to lie to me on a continual basis to get money, yell at me and take money when he doesn't work for it. [/QUOTE]
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