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Family of Origin
In a totally new place and need perspective? Cedar? Anyone?
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<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar *" data-source="post: 666146" data-attributes="member: 17461"><p>Defying my mother brings up imageries of being kicked; brings up my little brother's eyes. This is the feel of emotional flashback, Copa.</p><p></p><p>It's a frightening, confusing place.</p><p></p><p>But you are very brave.</p><p></p><p>This <em>is</em> the journey. These feelings, I mean.</p><p></p><p>Risks are not only permissible, but mandatory.</p><p></p><p>For me, during this time, I am suspicious of anything that is not flexible. If I hear something that smacks of anger in my self talk, my choice has been to sift through for the shame base that, for me, will have everything to do with how I interpret myself.</p><p></p><p>Shame, and (for me today) blaming, especially, are coming up against who I am supposed to be. Up against a role in me, then.</p><p></p><p>So I am exploring this area. My navigation system turns out to be absolutely useless to me, too. So, by the stars or by anything I can find, I am savoring the journey, tasting the hurt of those old definitions of self and mostly, coming away clearer.</p><p></p><p>Mostly.</p><p></p><p>Cedar</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar *, post: 666146, member: 17461"] Defying my mother brings up imageries of being kicked; brings up my little brother's eyes. This is the feel of emotional flashback, Copa. It's a frightening, confusing place. But you are very brave. This [I]is[/I] the journey. These feelings, I mean. Risks are not only permissible, but mandatory. For me, during this time, I am suspicious of anything that is not flexible. If I hear something that smacks of anger in my self talk, my choice has been to sift through for the shame base that, for me, will have everything to do with how I interpret myself. Shame, and (for me today) blaming, especially, are coming up against who I am supposed to be. Up against a role in me, then. So I am exploring this area. My navigation system turns out to be absolutely useless to me, too. So, by the stars or by anything I can find, I am savoring the journey, tasting the hurt of those old definitions of self and mostly, coming away clearer. Mostly. Cedar [/QUOTE]
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In a totally new place and need perspective? Cedar? Anyone?
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