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General Parenting
In School Suspension, Alternate Placements, and Other Ramblings
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 743870" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>This sounds horrible to me. This school, and school district. I agree with the others that the punishment seems way excessive. Your children seem ganged up on and as if there is public shaming going on.</p><p></p><p>I am glad the IEP is in process for the younger one, because if he is compliant at home there is something going on with him that is triggering him at school, such as a yet to be diagnosed learning disability, anxiety, or bullying, etc., or a combination of these (and I see he has an ADHD diagnosis). Bullying can be done by teachers too.</p><p></p><p>I do not know what to tell you. I yanked my son if there was this kind of thing happening which I perceived as abusive. But we were in a situation where I could seek alternatives and most people do not have that kind of flexibility.</p><p></p><p>I feel terrible for both boys if they lose their sports, because this is exactly the thing they both need, I would think. Neither one of them deserved this, I think.</p><p></p><p>When the system is punitive and unenlightened the only thing there is to do is fight, but that can bring down more on the kids. So you are in a double bind.</p><p></p><p>It sounds like your big boy is reasonable and self-aware. He seems to have handled what happened to him with maturity and self-restraint. While these things happen, from the little you write, it seems out of character for him. Were the boys supervised? Where was the teacher? Does he say what was going on?</p><p></p><p>This school seems so out of line I wonder if they are doing their job?</p><p></p><p>I mean, I do not want to defend bad behavior, but from what you describe, the problems seem to be with the system as much as with the kids.</p><p></p><p>I wish I could give you ideas, but really I can't. Schools here do not have the kind of power that you describe, and I really wonder if what this school is doing is even legal. You might check into that a little bit. It may well not be.</p><p></p><p>PS I see that younger son has ADHD. That is enough for an IEP. My son's IEP was based on this diagnosis, under other health impaired.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 743870, member: 18958"] This sounds horrible to me. This school, and school district. I agree with the others that the punishment seems way excessive. Your children seem ganged up on and as if there is public shaming going on. I am glad the IEP is in process for the younger one, because if he is compliant at home there is something going on with him that is triggering him at school, such as a yet to be diagnosed learning disability, anxiety, or bullying, etc., or a combination of these (and I see he has an ADHD diagnosis). Bullying can be done by teachers too. I do not know what to tell you. I yanked my son if there was this kind of thing happening which I perceived as abusive. But we were in a situation where I could seek alternatives and most people do not have that kind of flexibility. I feel terrible for both boys if they lose their sports, because this is exactly the thing they both need, I would think. Neither one of them deserved this, I think. When the system is punitive and unenlightened the only thing there is to do is fight, but that can bring down more on the kids. So you are in a double bind. It sounds like your big boy is reasonable and self-aware. He seems to have handled what happened to him with maturity and self-restraint. While these things happen, from the little you write, it seems out of character for him. Were the boys supervised? Where was the teacher? Does he say what was going on? This school seems so out of line I wonder if they are doing their job? I mean, I do not want to defend bad behavior, but from what you describe, the problems seem to be with the system as much as with the kids. I wish I could give you ideas, but really I can't. Schools here do not have the kind of power that you describe, and I really wonder if what this school is doing is even legal. You might check into that a little bit. It may well not be. PS I see that younger son has ADHD. That is enough for an IEP. My son's IEP was based on this diagnosis, under other health impaired. [/QUOTE]
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