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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 711298" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>Manners are manners, regardless of what kind of family you have or how big they are. That this is relatively new is telling to me. She is showing that she does not really want you as a friend, in my opinion. She wants your gift, hence the invitation, but not your friendship. Real friends don't behave this way.</p><p></p><p>My mom was horrified when I refused to send graduation announcements to allllll the many relatives who were out of state. I explained to her that I saw them as a greedy request for gifts and not something I wanted to participate in. She got it after that. I did call the relatives that I was close to, my godmother, my great aunts that I actually knew, etc... and explained that I wasn't sending announcements because I didn't need gifts, but I loved them and appreciated that they were happy for me. Some sent gifts anyway, but many were truly appreciative because they were on fixed incomes and we are a HUGE Catholic family and a TON of my cousins and their spawn are incredibly greedy. I may have gotten nicer gifts than some of the cousins because of this, but it was NOT my intention. I know that happened at my wedding when I did the same thing. </p><p></p><p>Your friend is showing a truly appalling lack of manners. Her late invitations truly are saying "I don't want you there, but go spend some cash on a gift for me anyway. I know you will, but I don't think you can see that I don't have friendly feelings toward you."</p><p></p><p>People show you what they are through their behavior, not through their words. She is NOT your friend.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 711298, member: 1233"] Manners are manners, regardless of what kind of family you have or how big they are. That this is relatively new is telling to me. She is showing that she does not really want you as a friend, in my opinion. She wants your gift, hence the invitation, but not your friendship. Real friends don't behave this way. My mom was horrified when I refused to send graduation announcements to allllll the many relatives who were out of state. I explained to her that I saw them as a greedy request for gifts and not something I wanted to participate in. She got it after that. I did call the relatives that I was close to, my godmother, my great aunts that I actually knew, etc... and explained that I wasn't sending announcements because I didn't need gifts, but I loved them and appreciated that they were happy for me. Some sent gifts anyway, but many were truly appreciative because they were on fixed incomes and we are a HUGE Catholic family and a TON of my cousins and their spawn are incredibly greedy. I may have gotten nicer gifts than some of the cousins because of this, but it was NOT my intention. I know that happened at my wedding when I did the same thing. Your friend is showing a truly appalling lack of manners. Her late invitations truly are saying "I don't want you there, but go spend some cash on a gift for me anyway. I know you will, but I don't think you can see that I don't have friendly feelings toward you." People show you what they are through their behavior, not through their words. She is NOT your friend. [/QUOTE]
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