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Substance Abuse
Is detaching ok right now? Or cruel?
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<blockquote data-quote="rebelson" data-source="post: 681204" data-attributes="member: 19966"><p>You all are so sweet & helpful. I am going to an Al Anon meeting at 10am tomorrow.<img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/felttip/praying.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":praying:" title="praying :praying:" data-shortname=":praying:" /></p><p>His comment about his story will be his own now, was when he was stoned or something. Yesterday, I called him and he was at the beach...with an old druggy friend. Lovely. I called him several times over several hours cuz I could tell he was stoned or drinking...I'm never sure what drug he's on as he's never honest! The only one thing I can be sure of, when he's on 'it', is alcohol..as he gets really, really mean. Anyways, he was acting odd, talking low and calmly, almost too calmly. He was saying 'I'm with some beautiful girls on the beach..' So, I asked him to give the girl his phone! Ha. She sounded very young..maybe 18ish? I asked her if my son was drinking...or anything? She said she didn't know, that he didn't have anything <em>with</em> him. She said <em>"I <strong>just</strong> met him."</em></p><p></p><p>Later, another phone call and some different girls, still on the beach. Asked to speak with another one, he put another one on the phone. I asked her her opinion, did she think son was drinking? Or was he really messed up, stumbling, etc.? She said 'honestly, he and his friend both seem like they're stoned.' She was more helpful than the last girl. She told me they weren't 'that bad'. Meaning not really that messed up. He <strong><em>'had' </em></strong>to be on something because letting 'mom' speak with some girls he just met....is NOT something he'd do sober!</p><p></p><p>Isn't this sad? I am so lacking in insight with-regards to son, that I am reduced to tricking my son to give phone over to strangers...asking them to let this worried mom know if son was in danger? <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/cry.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":cry:" title="cry :cry:" data-shortname=":cry:" /></p><p></p><p>He actually called me later asking for food $, said he spent the last 2 cards I sent him last week (Chipotle & Subway). I said 'no, I will not, cannot give you $ anymore! you spend it on alcohol!' I told him to call his Grammy, tell her your hungry..he said she won't answer phone anymore! He started begging me for food $, then he insulted me, so I took the opportunity to hang up on him. <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/felttip/speechless2.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":speechless2:" title="speechless2 :speechless2:" data-shortname=":speechless2:" /> No more calls from him last night.</p><p></p><p>Today, he texted me a song. Then, I texted him to see if he wanted a rescheduled dental appointment. He answered 'yes'. He still mentions going to Colombia! I think the roommate helped him to get an app for a passport! Grrrr. My husband said it takes a bit of time, to get a passport. Anybody know? I refuse to ask son any questions about it. I don't even know if his dad invited him there. This could very well be all of sons plan....<img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite9" alt=":eek:" title="Eek! :eek:" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":eek:" /> Well, he won't be able to go there without an airline ticket. And the dad's address!</p><p></p><p>Anybody know if Subway sells alcohol? This time I sent him a Subway and a Burger King gift card. I think Chipotle sells beer, etc..so that one was a bad idea. <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/redface.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":redface:" title="redface :redface:" data-shortname=":redface:" /></p><p></p><p>For now, I have my ringer on 'Do Not Disturb' at night, from 10:30-7:00am. That is what I am comfortable with at the moment.....</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="rebelson, post: 681204, member: 19966"] You all are so sweet & helpful. I am going to an Al Anon meeting at 10am tomorrow.:praying: His comment about his story will be his own now, was when he was stoned or something. Yesterday, I called him and he was at the beach...with an old druggy friend. Lovely. I called him several times over several hours cuz I could tell he was stoned or drinking...I'm never sure what drug he's on as he's never honest! The only one thing I can be sure of, when he's on 'it', is alcohol..as he gets really, really mean. Anyways, he was acting odd, talking low and calmly, almost too calmly. He was saying 'I'm with some beautiful girls on the beach..' So, I asked him to give the girl his phone! Ha. She sounded very young..maybe 18ish? I asked her if my son was drinking...or anything? She said she didn't know, that he didn't have anything [I]with[/I] him. She said [I]"I [B]just[/B] met him."[/I] Later, another phone call and some different girls, still on the beach. Asked to speak with another one, he put another one on the phone. I asked her her opinion, did she think son was drinking? Or was he really messed up, stumbling, etc.? She said 'honestly, he and his friend both seem like they're stoned.' She was more helpful than the last girl. She told me they weren't 'that bad'. Meaning not really that messed up. He [B][I]'had' [/I][/B]to be on something because letting 'mom' speak with some girls he just met....is NOT something he'd do sober! Isn't this sad? I am so lacking in insight with-regards to son, that I am reduced to tricking my son to give phone over to strangers...asking them to let this worried mom know if son was in danger? :cry: He actually called me later asking for food $, said he spent the last 2 cards I sent him last week (Chipotle & Subway). I said 'no, I will not, cannot give you $ anymore! you spend it on alcohol!' I told him to call his Grammy, tell her your hungry..he said she won't answer phone anymore! He started begging me for food $, then he insulted me, so I took the opportunity to hang up on him. :speechless2: No more calls from him last night. Today, he texted me a song. Then, I texted him to see if he wanted a rescheduled dental appointment. He answered 'yes'. He still mentions going to Colombia! I think the roommate helped him to get an app for a passport! Grrrr. My husband said it takes a bit of time, to get a passport. Anybody know? I refuse to ask son any questions about it. I don't even know if his dad invited him there. This could very well be all of sons plan....:eek: Well, he won't be able to go there without an airline ticket. And the dad's address! Anybody know if Subway sells alcohol? This time I sent him a Subway and a Burger King gift card. I think Chipotle sells beer, etc..so that one was a bad idea. :redface: For now, I have my ringer on 'Do Not Disturb' at night, from 10:30-7:00am. That is what I am comfortable with at the moment..... [/QUOTE]
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