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<blockquote data-quote="skittles" data-source="post: 754770" data-attributes="member: 2484"><p>Did you read a suggestion yet for the book Stop caretaking the Borderline or Narcissist:How to End the Drama and Get on With Life? Im reading it currently, has a great synopsis of how these relationships develop. I always thought there was something wrong with me, i still do often, that im some kind of spineless doormat ; but reading makes it clear, people with alot of empathy for others like yourself are those most likely to become emeshed like this. Its not that something is wrong with us, its that borderline/narcissists are very adept at finding ways to take advantage of the empathy in others and who has more empathy for them than their own mothers? They know this and will abuse it. Being a caring person is a wonderful trait, but it means we have to be vigilant that our caring too much does not become pathological to ourselves or others. People cant grow if we take all their hurt away and our job as parents is to teach them to be independent, not insulate them from the pain and joys of life. “if you love something set it free...”</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="skittles, post: 754770, member: 2484"] Did you read a suggestion yet for the book Stop caretaking the Borderline or Narcissist:How to End the Drama and Get on With Life? Im reading it currently, has a great synopsis of how these relationships develop. I always thought there was something wrong with me, i still do often, that im some kind of spineless doormat ; but reading makes it clear, people with alot of empathy for others like yourself are those most likely to become emeshed like this. Its not that something is wrong with us, its that borderline/narcissists are very adept at finding ways to take advantage of the empathy in others and who has more empathy for them than their own mothers? They know this and will abuse it. Being a caring person is a wonderful trait, but it means we have to be vigilant that our caring too much does not become pathological to ourselves or others. People cant grow if we take all their hurt away and our job as parents is to teach them to be independent, not insulate them from the pain and joys of life. “if you love something set it free...” [/QUOTE]
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