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Parent Emeritus
It’s me struggling again...
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<blockquote data-quote="JayPee" data-source="post: 750332" data-attributes="member: 23405"><p>Copa. </p><p></p><p>I agree with what you’ve said. I have been traumatized and I’m numb from the years of verbal abuse with the ex and my sons. They learned well from him. They say the most horrible things to me when they’re angry or don’t get what they want from me and it’s as if they said “have a nice day”. I don’t even react or feel anything anymore. I never thought of it from this perspective and keep thinking there’s just something wrong with me. </p><p></p><p>I really appreciate the thought and care you’ve put into your response and I feel like I can try to come at this from a different angle. </p><p></p><p>I constantly feel like I’ve failed and that I’m at fault and I’m always apologizing inwardly or outwardly. I’m never good enough. </p><p></p><p>I know from Al anon that I’m a fixer and controller but again saw this as my character defect. Again turning around loving and caring attributes into something I’m misusing. When no one else is there to verbally abuse me I internally do it to myself.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="JayPee, post: 750332, member: 23405"] Copa. I agree with what you’ve said. I have been traumatized and I’m numb from the years of verbal abuse with the ex and my sons. They learned well from him. They say the most horrible things to me when they’re angry or don’t get what they want from me and it’s as if they said “have a nice day”. I don’t even react or feel anything anymore. I never thought of it from this perspective and keep thinking there’s just something wrong with me. I really appreciate the thought and care you’ve put into your response and I feel like I can try to come at this from a different angle. I constantly feel like I’ve failed and that I’m at fault and I’m always apologizing inwardly or outwardly. I’m never good enough. I know from Al anon that I’m a fixer and controller but again saw this as my character defect. Again turning around loving and caring attributes into something I’m misusing. When no one else is there to verbally abuse me I internally do it to myself. [/QUOTE]
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It’s me struggling again...
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