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<blockquote data-quote="lovemysons" data-source="post: 764818" data-attributes="member: 3305"><p>You are a treasure Copa. I’m so sorry to hear that your “friends” do not offer you comfort and support in regards to your son. You have been deeply affected and hurt by the course of events and choices your son has made. </p><p>I am here for you as are many others from our board. You have a place in our hearts. A safe place where you will be understood. </p><p></p><p>Thank you for giving me your opinion about my former daughter in law. I think you are absolutely right! My grandchildren are her “possessions.” She is not looking at their present and future needs at all. She is only thinking of herself which is so intrinsically tied to addiction. That selfishness. If she were to be Able to feel what her children feel it would probably kill her. So she uses even more likely to dull the pain. I think this is also why she can so often be found at my son’s gravesite…an hour and a half away from her house. The guilt must do a number on her. She is the one who intentionally years ago threw our son out into the streets while pursuing another man who she had a baby with. Then went on to pursue even another man after that one ended and have yet another baby. All while still married to our son. </p><p>Yes our grandchildren are her “possessions.” </p><p>I intend on making a difference in their lives so that they can be seen and heard. So that they can securely share what’s going on inside. So they can finally live rather than merely existing. So they can know love. </p><p></p><p>New Leaf…I’m sorry to hear Tornado has no response to how her actions have affected the family. Again. I think it’s the selfish part of addiction. They don’t consider anyone but their own wants and desires. To feel it would cause them pain and they already have pain (mostly self induced) that causes them to want to use and not feel anything. </p><p></p><p>I understand about the part of being in pieces New Leaf. You know I do. That’s what drove me over the edge into insanity. Don’t let yourself despair too much over the girls…Gods girls. Let Him Work in their lives. </p><p>You don’t control the outcome and you are not nor ever have been responsible for it. </p><p>Their relationship with alcohol and drugs is their business. Their choice. It is a daily choice. One they could stop at anytime. </p><p>Allow yourself the freedom and space to live separately from them. In your head and heart. Let them be God’s problem. God’s children. </p><p>You’ve got a good life to live with your granddaughter and that is where your head and heart need to be. No reason to give the selfishness of Tornadoes choices any room inside. I pray youll let her go. Let go of that rope. God has her. </p><p></p><p>Love, </p><p>LMS</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="lovemysons, post: 764818, member: 3305"] You are a treasure Copa. I’m so sorry to hear that your “friends” do not offer you comfort and support in regards to your son. You have been deeply affected and hurt by the course of events and choices your son has made. I am here for you as are many others from our board. You have a place in our hearts. A safe place where you will be understood. Thank you for giving me your opinion about my former daughter in law. I think you are absolutely right! My grandchildren are her “possessions.” She is not looking at their present and future needs at all. She is only thinking of herself which is so intrinsically tied to addiction. That selfishness. If she were to be Able to feel what her children feel it would probably kill her. So she uses even more likely to dull the pain. I think this is also why she can so often be found at my son’s gravesite…an hour and a half away from her house. The guilt must do a number on her. She is the one who intentionally years ago threw our son out into the streets while pursuing another man who she had a baby with. Then went on to pursue even another man after that one ended and have yet another baby. All while still married to our son. Yes our grandchildren are her “possessions.” I intend on making a difference in their lives so that they can be seen and heard. So that they can securely share what’s going on inside. So they can finally live rather than merely existing. So they can know love. New Leaf…I’m sorry to hear Tornado has no response to how her actions have affected the family. Again. I think it’s the selfish part of addiction. They don’t consider anyone but their own wants and desires. To feel it would cause them pain and they already have pain (mostly self induced) that causes them to want to use and not feel anything. I understand about the part of being in pieces New Leaf. You know I do. That’s what drove me over the edge into insanity. Don’t let yourself despair too much over the girls…Gods girls. Let Him Work in their lives. You don’t control the outcome and you are not nor ever have been responsible for it. Their relationship with alcohol and drugs is their business. Their choice. It is a daily choice. One they could stop at anytime. Allow yourself the freedom and space to live separately from them. In your head and heart. Let them be God’s problem. God’s children. You’ve got a good life to live with your granddaughter and that is where your head and heart need to be. No reason to give the selfishness of Tornadoes choices any room inside. I pray youll let her go. Let go of that rope. God has her. Love, LMS [/QUOTE]
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