Feeling down and sad. Son called me at 5:45Pm last nite bawling his eyes out from the hospital saying he was sorry and that he had made a terrible mistake, he really messed up an made a bad choice, are we coming to see him soon? I said we would be there as soon as I finished with supper. We got to the hospital around 7:15. He was quiet as usual. We wanted to hear the results of his latest ekg, because it had been abnormal and he could not leave to go to the mental hospital until it was normalized. The nurse for some reason couldn't give us the results, said the team would be in shortly. Well, we waited until 9:00 and gave up, went home and asked them to call us with results. His heart is fine and normalizing, but mine is breaking, was broken.
The nurse called at 10:30PM and told me that the doctor on call last night told my son that they would be taking him to the mental hospital some time today, he was not supposed to have been told ahead of time THAT'S why he called me, pleading in his way to stay home. I am in tears as I type. I know he has to go, but if we had known that "he knew" we could have at least told him good luck, hang in there, we'll be there soon to visit, you know what I mean?! I felt so bad, almost as if we were lieing to him by not saying anything or referring to the mental hospital. I just cried when I hung the phone up. I am thinikgi maybe I should hurry up right now and go to the hospital before he leaves.
sighhhhhh.
