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Parent Emeritus
"It was/wasn't meant to be"
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 759248" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>What I hear you talking about is intention. Our intentions can't always carry the day, because other factors intrude. But your son seems to have an intention which is to use drugs and to otherwise forfeit responsibility for his life. 12 step groups are not a cure-all, but when somebody wants to face themselves and the reality of their life, actually the reality of life itself, they do work. But it's only because the person, the addict is willing to put in the work. Your son has not chosen to do this in a sustained way.In this you are in the same boat as many of the rest of us, myself included. </p><p></p><p>One adult can't force an intention on another adult. That is our learning. As long as a loved one is in this place and values the substance more than he does any other thing, it's kind of the over-arching reality. We can battle this and battle this. And this indeed is our own addiction. Living life on terms set by an addict, and not choosing to see and accept this in a sustained way.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 759248, member: 18958"] What I hear you talking about is intention. Our intentions can't always carry the day, because other factors intrude. But your son seems to have an intention which is to use drugs and to otherwise forfeit responsibility for his life. 12 step groups are not a cure-all, but when somebody wants to face themselves and the reality of their life, actually the reality of life itself, they do work. But it's only because the person, the addict is willing to put in the work. Your son has not chosen to do this in a sustained way.In this you are in the same boat as many of the rest of us, myself included. One adult can't force an intention on another adult. That is our learning. As long as a loved one is in this place and values the substance more than he does any other thing, it's kind of the over-arching reality. We can battle this and battle this. And this indeed is our own addiction. Living life on terms set by an addict, and not choosing to see and accept this in a sustained way. [/QUOTE]
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"It was/wasn't meant to be"
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