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<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar I" data-source="post: 49429" data-attributes="member: 3755"><p>This happens to me everytime too, catwoman.</p><p></p><p>husband told me to use the mantra "I don't have an issue with that." to myself, whenever I began to feel those old, hopeless feelings about difficult child.</p><p></p><p>It worked, for me.</p><p></p><p>The thing is that, if you are anything like me, you may fixate on that desperate need to help, to supply information if nothing else, to "be there" for your son, just in case his world falls apart.</p><p></p><p>Which, if your son is anything like mine, it probably will.</p><p></p><p>So, for moms like you and me, the only way we can really maintain relationships with our sons is to have a mantra like that one my husband came up with for me.</p><p></p><p>I am still, somewhere deep inside, hurt so deeply by what has happened that I do not see either my son or my own role in his life rationally.</p><p></p><p>That mantra is how I take care of myself.</p><p></p><p>I hope it helps you too, catwoman.</p><p></p><p>There are times I cannot believe how painful all this still is.</p><p></p><p>Barbara</p><p></p><p>.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar I, post: 49429, member: 3755"] This happens to me everytime too, catwoman. husband told me to use the mantra "I don't have an issue with that." to myself, whenever I began to feel those old, hopeless feelings about difficult child. It worked, for me. The thing is that, if you are anything like me, you may fixate on that desperate need to help, to supply information if nothing else, to "be there" for your son, just in case his world falls apart. Which, if your son is anything like mine, it probably will. So, for moms like you and me, the only way we can really maintain relationships with our sons is to have a mantra like that one my husband came up with for me. I am still, somewhere deep inside, hurt so deeply by what has happened that I do not see either my son or my own role in his life rationally. That mantra is how I take care of myself. I hope it helps you too, catwoman. There are times I cannot believe how painful all this still is. Barbara . [/QUOTE]
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