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Substance Abuse
Just feeling weak about the collateral damage
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 724610" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>sam. i am so sorry. i tried to post earlier but was wiped out. i wish i'd persevered.</p><p></p><p>in the post that got erased i seemed to have something to say that i felt was useful. right now, nothing. but that never stopped me.</p><p></p><p>this is a process. we are being recreated by it. our egos smashed to bits. but we are not just our egos. we are our selves, our cores are there, too. </p><p></p><p>i am trying to look at devastating events and circumstances in another way. a way that can serve me. </p><p></p><p>how can i reframe this, so that i can learn? how can this disaster be my teacher? how can i draw close to myself, to hold myself and heal? what is beyond the agony?</p><p></p><p>we cannot save our sons. but they can save themselves. they can and they do. </p><p></p><p>these are crashing waves. yes. but each wave recedes. </p><p></p><p>i grew up across the street from the pacific. etched in me is the image of the glistening, wet sand left by the receding wave. to me, there is no more perfect image of peace.</p><p></p><p>every breath has an exhale too. you have within you this peace. sometimes that is our greatest resource. our only available resource. breath. a place to go in oneself. </p><p></p><p>i am getting less worked up lately. less hysterically agitating. less insistent on making things happen. needing to control the story.</p><p></p><p>i think i am gaining more faith in myself. my son. and life itself. you are too.</p><p></p><p>let him be. the him or you is a feeling. exhaling does not mean you lose him. just as exhaling does not mean you'll die. you are just creating space for more breath to enter. just that. </p><p></p><p>you are not alone.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 724610, member: 18958"] sam. i am so sorry. i tried to post earlier but was wiped out. i wish i'd persevered. in the post that got erased i seemed to have something to say that i felt was useful. right now, nothing. but that never stopped me. this is a process. we are being recreated by it. our egos smashed to bits. but we are not just our egos. we are our selves, our cores are there, too. i am trying to look at devastating events and circumstances in another way. a way that can serve me. how can i reframe this, so that i can learn? how can this disaster be my teacher? how can i draw close to myself, to hold myself and heal? what is beyond the agony? we cannot save our sons. but they can save themselves. they can and they do. these are crashing waves. yes. but each wave recedes. i grew up across the street from the pacific. etched in me is the image of the glistening, wet sand left by the receding wave. to me, there is no more perfect image of peace. every breath has an exhale too. you have within you this peace. sometimes that is our greatest resource. our only available resource. breath. a place to go in oneself. i am getting less worked up lately. less hysterically agitating. less insistent on making things happen. needing to control the story. i think i am gaining more faith in myself. my son. and life itself. you are too. let him be. the him or you is a feeling. exhaling does not mean you lose him. just as exhaling does not mean you'll die. you are just creating space for more breath to enter. just that. you are not alone. [/QUOTE]
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Just feeling weak about the collateral damage
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