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Substance Abuse
Lonely adult son
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<blockquote data-quote="RN0441" data-source="post: 712610" data-attributes="member: 15032"><p>My son became a stranger at 15 most of the time. Due to drug and alcohol use. We are still trying to get through all of this with him and he'll be 22 in August. UGH.</p><p></p><p>We have had to FORCE it and it wasn't easy. Like his last therapist said, you aren't going to sit around and "wait until they are ready". She was a former addict also. He is now in a great sober living program and we still aren't sure if he's going to make the best of it and start his life in a positive way. It's hard to tell a 21 year old you can never have a beer again. </p><p></p><p>To get him moving in the right direction or moving at all you are probably going to have to enforce some strong boundaries with him. Obviously it is not mentally healthy for any of you to live like this. I know. I've been there too.</p><p></p><p>My husband and I went to see a therapist together. My husband said he'd go ONE TIME but only if I agreed to DO whatever he said. We did and I did.</p><p></p><p>We told him residential treatment or he'd have to leave. He chose residential. After treatment we said you cannot come home (again) because we'd been there and done that so we sent him to Florida. That was a year ago and he has had some bumps but is learning and my home is again serene and peaceful.</p><p></p><p>Those are just some ideas for you. Different things work for different people. I tried to sit and wait for things to change but they never did.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="RN0441, post: 712610, member: 15032"] My son became a stranger at 15 most of the time. Due to drug and alcohol use. We are still trying to get through all of this with him and he'll be 22 in August. UGH. We have had to FORCE it and it wasn't easy. Like his last therapist said, you aren't going to sit around and "wait until they are ready". She was a former addict also. He is now in a great sober living program and we still aren't sure if he's going to make the best of it and start his life in a positive way. It's hard to tell a 21 year old you can never have a beer again. To get him moving in the right direction or moving at all you are probably going to have to enforce some strong boundaries with him. Obviously it is not mentally healthy for any of you to live like this. I know. I've been there too. My husband and I went to see a therapist together. My husband said he'd go ONE TIME but only if I agreed to DO whatever he said. We did and I did. We told him residential treatment or he'd have to leave. He chose residential. After treatment we said you cannot come home (again) because we'd been there and done that so we sent him to Florida. That was a year ago and he has had some bumps but is learning and my home is again serene and peaceful. Those are just some ideas for you. Different things work for different people. I tried to sit and wait for things to change but they never did. [/QUOTE]
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