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<blockquote data-quote="Mirabelle" data-source="post: 762317" data-attributes="member: 28712"><p>Hello Love Tempered, </p><p></p><p>I can identify with a lot of what you have written about your son. My husband's son seems to have grown up with or developed a propensity for the belief that it is up to others to take care of him. He wants to go out on his own and be free from us but oops, that pesky part about having to be self supporting in order to make that happen. After three plus years of lurching from one bad decision to the next, he found himself for the first time actually homeless - the sleeping under a bridge type homeless. His mom, knowing that my husband and I are heading overseas to see family for a spell very soon (and therefore wouldn't be around to deal with her son), sprung into action and found a place for him at a 90 day rehab in another state. At first he seemed all jazzed to go, but since arriving has become complacent. To be honest I question whether he really wanted to go to rehab or just really wanted to get off the street. Plus if he is in rehab he doesn't have to hold a job, something he really does not want to do, according to him, ever. He wore out his welcome at his mom's (not working or contributing, disrespect etc.), then at our house (same reasons), then at a friend's relatives' house (same reasons), then at a homeless shelter (same reasons). It seems he either will not or is incapable of changing his self absorbed ways, and will simply migrate to the next host when the time comes to move on. And of course, when crunch time comes, according to him it is our responsibility to keep him alive, not his own. </p><p></p><p>Ho hum. We are enjoying the peace of mind and quiet while we have it to enjoy. Sometimes you just have to take those precious moments to stop thinking and enjoy the feeling of being a carefree human, even if just for a little while. </p><p></p><p>I wish you peace and comfort in your journey.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Mirabelle, post: 762317, member: 28712"] Hello Love Tempered, I can identify with a lot of what you have written about your son. My husband's son seems to have grown up with or developed a propensity for the belief that it is up to others to take care of him. He wants to go out on his own and be free from us but oops, that pesky part about having to be self supporting in order to make that happen. After three plus years of lurching from one bad decision to the next, he found himself for the first time actually homeless - the sleeping under a bridge type homeless. His mom, knowing that my husband and I are heading overseas to see family for a spell very soon (and therefore wouldn't be around to deal with her son), sprung into action and found a place for him at a 90 day rehab in another state. At first he seemed all jazzed to go, but since arriving has become complacent. To be honest I question whether he really wanted to go to rehab or just really wanted to get off the street. Plus if he is in rehab he doesn't have to hold a job, something he really does not want to do, according to him, ever. He wore out his welcome at his mom's (not working or contributing, disrespect etc.), then at our house (same reasons), then at a friend's relatives' house (same reasons), then at a homeless shelter (same reasons). It seems he either will not or is incapable of changing his self absorbed ways, and will simply migrate to the next host when the time comes to move on. And of course, when crunch time comes, according to him it is our responsibility to keep him alive, not his own. Ho hum. We are enjoying the peace of mind and quiet while we have it to enjoy. Sometimes you just have to take those precious moments to stop thinking and enjoy the feeling of being a carefree human, even if just for a little while. I wish you peace and comfort in your journey. [/QUOTE]
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