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Moody adult daughter?
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<blockquote data-quote="Triedntrue" data-source="post: 743405" data-attributes="member: 21499"><p>Relationships are always complicated and always have many facets that we don't understand.If i am reading this correctly fed up was the original poster. She went to help her daughter set up her nursery which was very kind of her. I am unclear on whether the daughter requested her help. She does not feel welcomed by her daughter. If daughter requested help and then is unwelcoming then i suggest mother tell her calmly you ask us to come and are making us feel unwelcome. Can you please tell me why. If mom took it upon herself to show up when daughter did not ask it may have been they wanted to do project by themselves. Like Copa and swot i have my own perspectives on relationships from my own experiences but they are not applicable here. To me it boils down to getting to the root of why daughter is unwelcoming which means having a conversation with her daughter and then explaining her side. After that both mother and daughter need to consider what boundaries need to be put in place and move on. Example if daughter is going to continue to be abusive mother needs to decide what she is willing to put up with if anything and make that clear. If daughter feels mother is in the wrong she needs to tell her why and what she is willing to accept. If they cant do that on their own they may need a mediator such as a councelor or a clergy. My son resents the amount of attention i have given to my oldest bipolar son and i accept that i am guilty of that but he needs to understand that i love all my sons. Our boundary is that i see them seperately and do not force conversations about him. This is very difficult for me around the Holidays. He still sees and talks to me far less often than i would like but is loving when we do. I have to accept that. He has to accept that i will not totally eliminate my oldest from my life. Prayers are with all of us with difficult choices to make.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Triedntrue, post: 743405, member: 21499"] Relationships are always complicated and always have many facets that we don't understand.If i am reading this correctly fed up was the original poster. She went to help her daughter set up her nursery which was very kind of her. I am unclear on whether the daughter requested her help. She does not feel welcomed by her daughter. If daughter requested help and then is unwelcoming then i suggest mother tell her calmly you ask us to come and are making us feel unwelcome. Can you please tell me why. If mom took it upon herself to show up when daughter did not ask it may have been they wanted to do project by themselves. Like Copa and swot i have my own perspectives on relationships from my own experiences but they are not applicable here. To me it boils down to getting to the root of why daughter is unwelcoming which means having a conversation with her daughter and then explaining her side. After that both mother and daughter need to consider what boundaries need to be put in place and move on. Example if daughter is going to continue to be abusive mother needs to decide what she is willing to put up with if anything and make that clear. If daughter feels mother is in the wrong she needs to tell her why and what she is willing to accept. If they cant do that on their own they may need a mediator such as a councelor or a clergy. My son resents the amount of attention i have given to my oldest bipolar son and i accept that i am guilty of that but he needs to understand that i love all my sons. Our boundary is that i see them seperately and do not force conversations about him. This is very difficult for me around the Holidays. He still sees and talks to me far less often than i would like but is loving when we do. I have to accept that. He has to accept that i will not totally eliminate my oldest from my life. Prayers are with all of us with difficult choices to make. [/QUOTE]
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