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General Parenting
My 5 and 1/2 year old son
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<blockquote data-quote="firehorsewoman" data-source="post: 536549"><p>Hi, Angela:</p><p></p><p>You have gotten some great advice here. I don't have much to add in that regard. Just wanted to tell you that my son sounds very, very, similar to your son! He too has been a "challenge" since birth. He is also extremely intelligent and like your son displays anger and defiance. He still to this day urinates on the floor in what I see as defiance or lack of impulse control. Many similarities with your son except that my son did have lots of problems with preschool and had to leave three programs (even asked to formerly leave one) before we found him a school that would work with him and not challenge him. We were "fortunate" that he had epilepsy so we were able to get a neuropsychologist evaluation done at a children's hospital without us going through much trouble to get one. His diagnoses were primary ODD and secondary ADHD when he was three and most recent evaluation at 7 years old flip flopped them saying ADHD primary and ODD secondary. He now controls his anger at school (like your son) so it is still possible that your boy has ODD. So many of these conditions overlap it is a challenge at best to determine what exactly is going on with them. Some of these kids can hold it together at school. My son does have lots of other issues at school besides anger though. He works a grade level ahead on all subjects, gets all A's on academic subjects but his conduct grades are always "N" (needs improvement) for talking, lack of impulse control, not following directions, etc. </p><p></p><p>Just wanted to share some of my story with you so you do not feel alone. In my experience, friends and family just don't get it most of the time...some may start to understand once they are informed or educated regarding Conduct Disorders but many never will. I am sure that you have gotten plenty of "helpful" parenting advice from people that just don't get it. We get it. </p><p></p><p>hang in there!</p><p></p><p>PS. You write "we" so I am going to assume that you are married. Pardon me if this is incorrect. Make sure to take care of your marriage. As one of my son's docs told us early on, families with kids like ours are at high risk of divorce. I don't think it causes divorce but if there are any weakness or areas that need attention, having a difficult child child will surely bring them out and magnify them.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="firehorsewoman, post: 536549"] Hi, Angela: You have gotten some great advice here. I don't have much to add in that regard. Just wanted to tell you that my son sounds very, very, similar to your son! He too has been a "challenge" since birth. He is also extremely intelligent and like your son displays anger and defiance. He still to this day urinates on the floor in what I see as defiance or lack of impulse control. Many similarities with your son except that my son did have lots of problems with preschool and had to leave three programs (even asked to formerly leave one) before we found him a school that would work with him and not challenge him. We were "fortunate" that he had epilepsy so we were able to get a neuropsychologist evaluation done at a children's hospital without us going through much trouble to get one. His diagnoses were primary ODD and secondary ADHD when he was three and most recent evaluation at 7 years old flip flopped them saying ADHD primary and ODD secondary. He now controls his anger at school (like your son) so it is still possible that your boy has ODD. So many of these conditions overlap it is a challenge at best to determine what exactly is going on with them. Some of these kids can hold it together at school. My son does have lots of other issues at school besides anger though. He works a grade level ahead on all subjects, gets all A's on academic subjects but his conduct grades are always "N" (needs improvement) for talking, lack of impulse control, not following directions, etc. Just wanted to share some of my story with you so you do not feel alone. In my experience, friends and family just don't get it most of the time...some may start to understand once they are informed or educated regarding Conduct Disorders but many never will. I am sure that you have gotten plenty of "helpful" parenting advice from people that just don't get it. We get it. hang in there! PS. You write "we" so I am going to assume that you are married. Pardon me if this is incorrect. Make sure to take care of your marriage. As one of my son's docs told us early on, families with kids like ours are at high risk of divorce. I don't think it causes divorce but if there are any weakness or areas that need attention, having a difficult child child will surely bring them out and magnify them. [/QUOTE]
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