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<blockquote data-quote="scent of cedar" data-source="post: 599892" data-attributes="member: 1721">Yes.We give and give and give to our adult children ~ and they cold-bloodedly take everything we have and imply that it was not enough.Or not good enough.Or not soon enough, or frequent enough.We suffer, agonizing over everything that should have been, over why our children's lives have turned so sour, over how to help them become the adults we could see so clearly in our dreams for them, when they were little.Here on the site seo, we have suffered as you are suffering, now.&nbsp; We have learned to come here for support, to come here to tell those terrible secret thoughts that are draining the life out of us, that are stealing the color from our days and making our nights a living, breathing Hell of recrimination and worry and hope and despair.This helped me, in the night.&nbsp; It is the Serenity Prayer.&nbsp; Years ago, when I was new here, one of the ladies on the site told me I needed to read and reread it until I got it, until it worked.&nbsp; That is the key, seo.&nbsp; Read and reread it until you feel strong enough to go through the next five minutes with your head up and your eyes dry.It's like we are in a battle, seo.&nbsp; Or a war that never ends.&nbsp; We need to learn those little things that will give us enough strength to face and function through the next badness, the next horror, the next unbelievable, crappy thing.Here you go.&nbsp; Know that we are holding you and your son in our thoughts and in our prayers.&nbsp; I know it doesn't feel much like it right now, but you are going to make it through all this just fine.&nbsp; Your son's situation may not improve?&nbsp; But you will learn how to bear it, here with us.GOD, GRANT ME THE SERENITY TO ACCEPT THE THINGS I CANNOT CHANGETHE COURAGE TO CHANGE THE THINGS I CANAND THE WISDOM TO KNOW THE DIFFERENCEI still say this prayer, over and over and over again, when I wake up in the night and cannot sleep because of the horror of what's happened.&nbsp; Those soothing rhythms, that feeling that we will be given the courage we need to see things through, helps me to rest.BarbaraThe &quot;McCoy&quot; link at the bottoms of my posts tells us ways to think about, and words to say, to our troubled adult children.:O)</blockquote>

[QUOTE="scent of cedar, post: 599892, member: 1721"] Yes. We give and give and give to our adult children ~ and they cold-bloodedly take everything we have and imply that it was not enough. Or not good enough. Or not soon enough, or frequent enough. We suffer, agonizing over everything that should have been, over why our children's lives have turned so sour, over how to help them become the adults we could see so clearly in our dreams for them, when they were little. Here on the site seo, we have suffered as you are suffering, now. We have learned to come here for support, to come here to tell those terrible secret thoughts that are draining the life out of us, that are stealing the color from our days and making our nights a living, breathing Hell of recrimination and worry and hope and despair. This helped me, in the night. It is the Serenity Prayer. Years ago, when I was new here, one of the ladies on the site told me I needed to read and reread it until I got it, until it worked. That is the key, seo. Read and reread it until you feel strong enough to go through the next five minutes with your head up and your eyes dry. It's like we are in a battle, seo. Or a war that never ends. We need to learn those little things that will give us enough strength to face and function through the next badness, the next horror, the next unbelievable, crappy thing. Here you go. Know that we are holding you and your son in our thoughts and in our prayers. I know it doesn't feel much like it right now, but you are going to make it through all this just fine. Your son's situation may not improve? But you will learn how to bear it, here with us. GOD, GRANT ME THE SERENITY TO ACCEPT THE THINGS I CANNOT CHANGE THE COURAGE TO CHANGE THE THINGS I CAN AND THE WISDOM TO KNOW THE DIFFERENCE I still say this prayer, over and over and over again, when I wake up in the night and cannot sleep because of the horror of what's happened. Those soothing rhythms, that feeling that we will be given the courage we need to see things through, helps me to rest. Barbara The "McCoy" link at the bottoms of my posts tells us ways to think about, and words to say, to our troubled adult children. :O) [/QUOTE]

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