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My brother steals from my family
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<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 536086" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>Hello and welcome to the board. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p><p></p><p>The whole.........</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>Throws up a red flag for autism spectrum. So does the stealing, taking things for just the sake of taking them. That may not be kleptomania, but an inability to recognize personal boundaries. My son had this issue for literally YEARS. Not money per se. But he'd take all sorts of random things without giving any thought to it from anyone in the house. It was as if because they were in the house, they were equally his to take in his mind. It took some creative thinking and hard work to turn that around and help him to learn those boundaries.......and it wasn't done overnight. And when confronted, Travis would usually be baffled as to why someone was upset with him, it would take him a bit before he'd admit to it. It depended on how he was asked. Because autistic or not, he learned over time when confronted to deny first.....because he could usually register anger from others. But he usually wound up being honest about it in the end. Heck for that matter, at one time he did it so much he simply forgot that he took some of the things he did. </p><p></p><p>But I will say the selling items for cash........makes me wonder if something else isn't going on. There are other addictions besides drugs/alcohol. Could he be in to gambling? Or could it be some other addictive behaviors? </p><p></p><p>A diagnosis doesn't excuse inappropriate behavior, nor make it acceptable, it explains it and may provide a means to change that behavior. But since your brother is now an adult, he will have to be the one willing to be evaluated by professionals to see if indeed there is a diagnosis to be treated. Depending on your brother's medical history and genetics........it could be any number of things.....or just simply that he has another issue that hasn't come to light yet.</p><p></p><p>As his sister, you're in a an awkward position. And I know it can be difficult and hurtful and really create a LOT of resentment. I know because it did for my girls. It was only when Travis began to really catch on to personal boundaries and there was a noticeable change that they slowly began to let it go and move past it. It took time. And because I could see their side, I'd let them vent it to me....without judgement.....so they had someone to talk to about it. I also helped them educate themselves about his diagnosis' so that they could better understand him. </p><p></p><p>I'm glad you found us. </p><p></p><p>(((hugs)))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 536086, member: 84"] Hello and welcome to the board. :) The whole......... Throws up a red flag for autism spectrum. So does the stealing, taking things for just the sake of taking them. That may not be kleptomania, but an inability to recognize personal boundaries. My son had this issue for literally YEARS. Not money per se. But he'd take all sorts of random things without giving any thought to it from anyone in the house. It was as if because they were in the house, they were equally his to take in his mind. It took some creative thinking and hard work to turn that around and help him to learn those boundaries.......and it wasn't done overnight. And when confronted, Travis would usually be baffled as to why someone was upset with him, it would take him a bit before he'd admit to it. It depended on how he was asked. Because autistic or not, he learned over time when confronted to deny first.....because he could usually register anger from others. But he usually wound up being honest about it in the end. Heck for that matter, at one time he did it so much he simply forgot that he took some of the things he did. But I will say the selling items for cash........makes me wonder if something else isn't going on. There are other addictions besides drugs/alcohol. Could he be in to gambling? Or could it be some other addictive behaviors? A diagnosis doesn't excuse inappropriate behavior, nor make it acceptable, it explains it and may provide a means to change that behavior. But since your brother is now an adult, he will have to be the one willing to be evaluated by professionals to see if indeed there is a diagnosis to be treated. Depending on your brother's medical history and genetics........it could be any number of things.....or just simply that he has another issue that hasn't come to light yet. As his sister, you're in a an awkward position. And I know it can be difficult and hurtful and really create a LOT of resentment. I know because it did for my girls. It was only when Travis began to really catch on to personal boundaries and there was a noticeable change that they slowly began to let it go and move past it. It took time. And because I could see their side, I'd let them vent it to me....without judgement.....so they had someone to talk to about it. I also helped them educate themselves about his diagnosis' so that they could better understand him. I'm glad you found us. (((hugs))) [/QUOTE]
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