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My son is a bully!
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<blockquote data-quote="SunnyFlorida" data-source="post: 78515" data-attributes="member: 696"><p>Hi and welcome.</p><p>You've got some work to do cuppa.</p><p>Your difficult child sounds like my difficult child 1. I originally thought difficult child 1 had adhd. That's what they psychologist, psychiatrist, and a smathering of other docs said. We did the usual tx for the disorder including medications and behavioral therapy. He ended up getting in drugs with marijuana being his drug of choice. Between the drugs and the diagnosis, his diagnosis ended up changing to be bipolar. Bipolar could have been the diagnosis when he was younger but at that time they weren't diagnosing it.</p><p></p><p>Anger is a manipulative tool as well as his intimidation. difficult child's don't like to be around people who don't put up with them. They are more afraid/dislike the people who put up boundries and don't let them get away their shenanigans. It took me a long time to understand and comprehend that. My mommy heart just wouldn't accept it.</p><p></p><p>Al anon may be able to teach you some "tools" for setting boundries and learning "quick exit retreats" when your difficult child is raging. Al anon may be able to teach you how to recognize when you are being manipulated as well. As soon as you put some boundries in place and don't feed into his manipulation, you will see huge changes.</p><p></p><p>You might want to really research this site as it has lots of information on other diagnosis as well.</p><p></p><p>Because damage is occuring to your property, your difficult child should be held accountable for his actions. If he's not paying for the repairs, he should be. You are under no obligation legally to house or feed him. Standing your ground will show difficult child that he cannot continue what he does.</p><p></p><p>Don't worry about the verbal tirade either, it's a front and your difficult child knows it. Just don't feed into it. Your difficult child will either apologize in a few days or react as if nothing happened.</p><p></p><p>It's time to separate.....you are not his friend, you are his mother. He has an obligation to honor you not treat you like a doormat.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SunnyFlorida, post: 78515, member: 696"] Hi and welcome. You've got some work to do cuppa. Your difficult child sounds like my difficult child 1. I originally thought difficult child 1 had adhd. That's what they psychologist, psychiatrist, and a smathering of other docs said. We did the usual tx for the disorder including medications and behavioral therapy. He ended up getting in drugs with marijuana being his drug of choice. Between the drugs and the diagnosis, his diagnosis ended up changing to be bipolar. Bipolar could have been the diagnosis when he was younger but at that time they weren't diagnosing it. Anger is a manipulative tool as well as his intimidation. difficult child's don't like to be around people who don't put up with them. They are more afraid/dislike the people who put up boundries and don't let them get away their shenanigans. It took me a long time to understand and comprehend that. My mommy heart just wouldn't accept it. Al anon may be able to teach you some "tools" for setting boundries and learning "quick exit retreats" when your difficult child is raging. Al anon may be able to teach you how to recognize when you are being manipulated as well. As soon as you put some boundries in place and don't feed into his manipulation, you will see huge changes. You might want to really research this site as it has lots of information on other diagnosis as well. Because damage is occuring to your property, your difficult child should be held accountable for his actions. If he's not paying for the repairs, he should be. You are under no obligation legally to house or feed him. Standing your ground will show difficult child that he cannot continue what he does. Don't worry about the verbal tirade either, it's a front and your difficult child knows it. Just don't feed into it. Your difficult child will either apologize in a few days or react as if nothing happened. It's time to separate.....you are not his friend, you are his mother. He has an obligation to honor you not treat you like a doormat. [/QUOTE]
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