Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
My son is spiraling down
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 675176" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>This is your intention. It makes perfect sense. It is highly appropriate for him and for you. This is what he wants you to think. Understand this: nothing you do or do not do has any influence on what he will or will not do.</p><p></p><p>Only he can change. Only he decides to do things that are destructive or self-destructive. He wants to put the responsibility in you. Do not take it. That is what I think.</p><p>Good thinking on his part. I would have his stuff ready on the porch. I would not engage.</p><p>This too is a true thing. You and he are ready for the next stage.</p><p></p><p>He is telling you he needs to and wants to be his own man. Whatever he decides that will be. He is pushing your buttons for you to respond proactively. To let him go.</p><p></p><p>I would prepare his stuff. I would say goodbye. If there is any trouble, threats against you or towards himself I would be ready to call the police. They will escort him away from the house.</p><p></p><p>That is what I would do. Of course, the decisions are yours to make.</p><p></p><p>We have been here in this exact situation. The police. The whole thing. The moment I decided to respond in this way, things got better.</p><p></p><p>They have to begin to live the consequences of their choices. If it is prison, so be it. Only then will there be any incentive to change. You or I cannot provide the motivation or incentive. We only get in the way. They do not need mothers or parents now. They need themselves.</p><p></p><p>I know how hard it is. You are doing great in a very difficult and confusing situation. None of it of your making.</p><p></p><p>If it were me I would do this, knowing what I know now: Follow through. Set a limit to protect yourself, your family, your household. In this way you are acting for your son, too. Where he needs to go. What he needs to do. To be. A grown up.</p><p></p><p>Keep posting. He will not make it easy. Do it anyway. That is what I think.</p><p></p><p>COPA</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 675176, member: 18958"] This is your intention. It makes perfect sense. It is highly appropriate for him and for you. This is what he wants you to think. Understand this: nothing you do or do not do has any influence on what he will or will not do. Only he can change. Only he decides to do things that are destructive or self-destructive. He wants to put the responsibility in you. Do not take it. That is what I think. Good thinking on his part. I would have his stuff ready on the porch. I would not engage. This too is a true thing. You and he are ready for the next stage. He is telling you he needs to and wants to be his own man. Whatever he decides that will be. He is pushing your buttons for you to respond proactively. To let him go. I would prepare his stuff. I would say goodbye. If there is any trouble, threats against you or towards himself I would be ready to call the police. They will escort him away from the house. That is what I would do. Of course, the decisions are yours to make. We have been here in this exact situation. The police. The whole thing. The moment I decided to respond in this way, things got better. They have to begin to live the consequences of their choices. If it is prison, so be it. Only then will there be any incentive to change. You or I cannot provide the motivation or incentive. We only get in the way. They do not need mothers or parents now. They need themselves. I know how hard it is. You are doing great in a very difficult and confusing situation. None of it of your making. If it were me I would do this, knowing what I know now: Follow through. Set a limit to protect yourself, your family, your household. In this way you are acting for your son, too. Where he needs to go. What he needs to do. To be. A grown up. Keep posting. He will not make it easy. Do it anyway. That is what I think. COPA [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
My son is spiraling down
Top