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My son left. I asked him to.
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<blockquote data-quote="DarkwingPsyduck" data-source="post: 688207" data-attributes="member: 20267"><p>No, not out of line the least. In fact, most people in similar positions as your son would be quite envious of this. </p><p></p><p>If it is something you're capable of doing, and willing to do, that's excellent. He is lucky to have somebody like you. You have the right idea. Words aren't good enough from an addict. It's either put up, or shut up. And you insisting he actually demonstrate these things to you, as opposed to just promising <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/2012/censored2.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":censored2:" title="censored2 :censored2:" data-shortname=":censored2:" /> he has no intention of doing, is excellent. I mean, it sets a very clear outline for what you expect from him if he chooses to participate. Which means, if he dicks it up, you can point to this post and remind him that THIS is what you expected, and what he agreed to. Hopefully, that will take away some of those guilty feelings you get when he slips up. It NEEDS to be in writing. We try to weasel our way out of EVERY negative consequence, and some of us are very good at it. Aunt says I should have been a lawyer. I am a master wordsmith. Of the highest caliber. When making arrangements with addicts like myself, it needs to be in writing, in no uncertain terms. No shaky terminology that can be exploited. I know it sounds crazy, but we survive off of being able to bullshit everybody. To manipulate everybody around us. We will sniff out any loop hole that exists.</p><p></p><p>So, I would suggest you put all of that in writing. Make sure he reads it and acknowledges every single point. Make sure there is NO confusion on what is expected of him if he chooses to take advantage of your incredible generosity, and what will happen if he chooses to violate those conditions.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DarkwingPsyduck, post: 688207, member: 20267"] No, not out of line the least. In fact, most people in similar positions as your son would be quite envious of this. If it is something you're capable of doing, and willing to do, that's excellent. He is lucky to have somebody like you. You have the right idea. Words aren't good enough from an addict. It's either put up, or shut up. And you insisting he actually demonstrate these things to you, as opposed to just promising :censored2: he has no intention of doing, is excellent. I mean, it sets a very clear outline for what you expect from him if he chooses to participate. Which means, if he dicks it up, you can point to this post and remind him that THIS is what you expected, and what he agreed to. Hopefully, that will take away some of those guilty feelings you get when he slips up. It NEEDS to be in writing. We try to weasel our way out of EVERY negative consequence, and some of us are very good at it. Aunt says I should have been a lawyer. I am a master wordsmith. Of the highest caliber. When making arrangements with addicts like myself, it needs to be in writing, in no uncertain terms. No shaky terminology that can be exploited. I know it sounds crazy, but we survive off of being able to bullshit everybody. To manipulate everybody around us. We will sniff out any loop hole that exists. So, I would suggest you put all of that in writing. Make sure he reads it and acknowledges every single point. Make sure there is NO confusion on what is expected of him if he chooses to take advantage of your incredible generosity, and what will happen if he chooses to violate those conditions. [/QUOTE]
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My son left. I asked him to.
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