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my son on his own
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<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar I" data-source="post: 74827" data-attributes="member: 3755"><p>How are you holding up, SWC?</p><p></p><p>And how is husband?</p><p></p><p>The last time we had our son home to live, he was twenty-nine or thirty. Despite everything we had told ourselves, despite everything we knew, we took him in BECAUSE HE IS OUR SON. </p><p></p><p>It takes a really long time, to be able to turn away. Before we could do that, we needed to exhaust every single possibility that we could to help our son.</p><p></p><p>I became so depressed, so fixated on our lost child that I don't think that I have fully recovered to this day.</p><p></p><p>But I did what I had to do.</p><p></p><p>I had to do it.</p><p></p><p>And it doesn't do any of us one bit of good to beat ourselves or each other up if we just are not in that place where we need to be to tell our own children there is nothing we can do to help them.</p><p></p><p>What you need to do now, I think, is get to an Al-Anon or a Narc-Anon meeting. It doesn't matter whether husband goes with you or whether you go in another town ~ just get there.</p><p></p><p>Check out the Hazelden and Teen Challenge websites and make a few phone calls. Just to see what your options are. In Minnesota, a mother can call 211 and be immediately connected to people who can help her know what to try, next. There may be such a number in your state, too.</p><p></p><p>Wishing well.</p><p></p><p>Barbara</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar I, post: 74827, member: 3755"] How are you holding up, SWC? And how is husband? The last time we had our son home to live, he was twenty-nine or thirty. Despite everything we had told ourselves, despite everything we knew, we took him in BECAUSE HE IS OUR SON. It takes a really long time, to be able to turn away. Before we could do that, we needed to exhaust every single possibility that we could to help our son. I became so depressed, so fixated on our lost child that I don't think that I have fully recovered to this day. But I did what I had to do. I had to do it. And it doesn't do any of us one bit of good to beat ourselves or each other up if we just are not in that place where we need to be to tell our own children there is nothing we can do to help them. What you need to do now, I think, is get to an Al-Anon or a Narc-Anon meeting. It doesn't matter whether husband goes with you or whether you go in another town ~ just get there. Check out the Hazelden and Teen Challenge websites and make a few phone calls. Just to see what your options are. In Minnesota, a mother can call 211 and be immediately connected to people who can help her know what to try, next. There may be such a number in your state, too. Wishing well. Barbara [/QUOTE]
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