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Substance Abuse
My son relapsed....
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<blockquote data-quote="rebelson" data-source="post: 695529" data-attributes="member: 19966"><p>No, he would've applied 4 months ago, when he <strong>1st entered </strong>the sober house. When you're accepted (100% of addicts are accepted), you are good for 4 or 6 month increments at a time, $194/month. Then, they just reapply.</p><p></p><p>I shared that with you, that they can and do sell gift cards, because the women on here shared it with me. And I think it's a good thing to know. I was clueless to the fact. In our shoes, I don't think too much information is possible. I was actually a victim of this action on my addict's part. Yes, your son is good right now. But, that can change with the blink of an eye. He could get the urge at any time or moment. If he ever, (God protect him to not) gets to the relapse point, and he has a gift card, he could sell it, and then use for relapse drug of choice. You would not find out till after the fact. That is all I am saying, again, I have lived this. I feel angry right now, that my son fudged the amt of dental bill due (by $4), that I gave him for something good for him - dental work, then used the $4 for liquor for his relapse. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite3" alt=":(" title="Frown :(" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":(" /> And, no, I am not so much blaming myself as he would've gotten the liquor some other way. But, still. This past incident has been a real eye opener to me, that I cannot believe ANYTHING he says, <em>even 'though he's sober in sober living and gets tested'. </em></p><p><em></em></p><p>We really have to always & without fail, be a few steps ahead of them. Never assume 'never', or 'won't happen'.</p><p></p><p>My son, the past 4 months, has hardly asked me for $ at all. He has food stamps so that is taken care of. So, if he sells the food stamps? Not my money, not my problem! Not my monkey, not my circus. Who would suffer if he sold ebt card? He would, by the hunger pangs that inevitably follow. And for one who loves the gym and to work out, & consumed with the proper mixture of carbs & proteins & having a small meal every 3hrs...kinda hard to do, when you're without food $. But, the best thing about the ebt card? It's not OUR money he would be selling.</p><p></p><p>On the few occasions I did transfer over $ for him for a 'legit' request, when he was not in 'relapse' danger, he did not 'misuse' it. I could tell by his bank account transactions. But, with last week's relapse, apparently he was in 'relapse zone', unbeknownst to me. So, when I transferred the dental treatment $ to his account, I was not overly worried about the exact bill amount. Because I '<em>thought he was good</em>'. But, he was <em>not </em>good.</p><p></p><p>You are way kinder than I, in giving him $200/month when he could have had that amount in food stamps all this time. <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/Graemlins/smirk.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":smirk:" title="smirk :smirk:" data-shortname=":smirk:" /></p><p></p><p>I'm so happy for you, that you are so strong. I wish I was.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="rebelson, post: 695529, member: 19966"] No, he would've applied 4 months ago, when he [B]1st entered [/B]the sober house. When you're accepted (100% of addicts are accepted), you are good for 4 or 6 month increments at a time, $194/month. Then, they just reapply. I shared that with you, that they can and do sell gift cards, because the women on here shared it with me. And I think it's a good thing to know. I was clueless to the fact. In our shoes, I don't think too much information is possible. I was actually a victim of this action on my addict's part. Yes, your son is good right now. But, that can change with the blink of an eye. He could get the urge at any time or moment. If he ever, (God protect him to not) gets to the relapse point, and he has a gift card, he could sell it, and then use for relapse drug of choice. You would not find out till after the fact. That is all I am saying, again, I have lived this. I feel angry right now, that my son fudged the amt of dental bill due (by $4), that I gave him for something good for him - dental work, then used the $4 for liquor for his relapse. :( And, no, I am not so much blaming myself as he would've gotten the liquor some other way. But, still. This past incident has been a real eye opener to me, that I cannot believe ANYTHING he says, [I]even 'though he's sober in sober living and gets tested'. [/I] We really have to always & without fail, be a few steps ahead of them. Never assume 'never', or 'won't happen'. My son, the past 4 months, has hardly asked me for $ at all. He has food stamps so that is taken care of. So, if he sells the food stamps? Not my money, not my problem! Not my monkey, not my circus. Who would suffer if he sold ebt card? He would, by the hunger pangs that inevitably follow. And for one who loves the gym and to work out, & consumed with the proper mixture of carbs & proteins & having a small meal every 3hrs...kinda hard to do, when you're without food $. But, the best thing about the ebt card? It's not OUR money he would be selling. On the few occasions I did transfer over $ for him for a 'legit' request, when he was not in 'relapse' danger, he did not 'misuse' it. I could tell by his bank account transactions. But, with last week's relapse, apparently he was in 'relapse zone', unbeknownst to me. So, when I transferred the dental treatment $ to his account, I was not overly worried about the exact bill amount. Because I '[I]thought he was good[/I]'. But, he was [I]not [/I]good. You are way kinder than I, in giving him $200/month when he could have had that amount in food stamps all this time. :smirk: I'm so happy for you, that you are so strong. I wish I was. [/QUOTE]
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