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<blockquote data-quote="startingfresh" data-source="post: 757922" data-attributes="member: 22380"><p>MissLulu, I am right there with you. My son moved out when he was 19 only to move back several months later after checking himself into the hospital as he knew he was spiraling out of control. The time he was on his own had some good spots but was filled with spurts of reckless behavior and ups and downs. It was terrifying and although living with him again was stressful, I was ever vigilant in keeping him safe which of course was a fools errand and I had to stop my obsessing over him. If he overslept for work, I was aware. If he drank too much, I was aware. On and on. Fast forward almost 2 years and he just moved out into his own apartment. He has made tremendous progress in the past few years and I can honestly say if he was going to continue to grow up and be independent, he had to be on his own. He got his own apartment and moved in a week ago. My home is peaceful once again and I notice all the time the difference. I hear a thump in the night and I am not worried it is him falling. I hear the door open or creeks on the steps in the middle of the night and I am not worried about what it might be. I feel myself letting go a tiny bit of the ever present anxiety I feel . Yet, sometimes he will text something that sets me off worrying and I flashback and can't seem to get control over the gut churning fear of what it might mean. I do think it is ptsd. I hate that you are in a similar spot but there is comfort in knowing I am not alone. I try to fall asleep by repeating the Serenity prayer over and over.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="startingfresh, post: 757922, member: 22380"] MissLulu, I am right there with you. My son moved out when he was 19 only to move back several months later after checking himself into the hospital as he knew he was spiraling out of control. The time he was on his own had some good spots but was filled with spurts of reckless behavior and ups and downs. It was terrifying and although living with him again was stressful, I was ever vigilant in keeping him safe which of course was a fools errand and I had to stop my obsessing over him. If he overslept for work, I was aware. If he drank too much, I was aware. On and on. Fast forward almost 2 years and he just moved out into his own apartment. He has made tremendous progress in the past few years and I can honestly say if he was going to continue to grow up and be independent, he had to be on his own. He got his own apartment and moved in a week ago. My home is peaceful once again and I notice all the time the difference. I hear a thump in the night and I am not worried it is him falling. I hear the door open or creeks on the steps in the middle of the night and I am not worried about what it might be. I feel myself letting go a tiny bit of the ever present anxiety I feel . Yet, sometimes he will text something that sets me off worrying and I flashback and can't seem to get control over the gut churning fear of what it might mean. I do think it is ptsd. I hate that you are in a similar spot but there is comfort in knowing I am not alone. I try to fall asleep by repeating the Serenity prayer over and over. [/QUOTE]
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