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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 743461" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Annie. I wanted to add one more thing. I worked in maximum security prisons for many years. I met thousands of men like your son. Many of these men wake up. They come to experience a before and after in their lives and they come to have great regret.</p><p></p><p>There are so many factors that could be underlying your son's descent. Right now he is living within a nightmare, and everything he experiences is perceived through its veil. The veil could be drugs. It could be an acute mental illness. It could be character. It could be neurological. It could be developmental. It could be weakness that could be overcome. Or most likely, a combination of various factors.</p><p></p><p>But for many,the entry of a little bit of insight, or faith, or intervention, maturity, a great shock like long-term incarceration, or the removal of one determinant, like recovery from drugs--can catalyze a shifting.</p><p></p><p>We do not have to assume that your son has been operating from what is the whole him, either that he is operating using all of his cylinders right now, or what could be his future self.</p><p></p><p>The thing is that your intervention is not the catalyst that will change him. That is the only thing to be accepted right now. You would only be more collateral damage. I think that is what the therapist is telling you. </p><p></p><p>How to have a voice into his life, we cannot know right now. But I feel confident that in time you will find a voice, a way. As the beautiful text/letter you wrote to him from a window into your soul, there will be other windows, too.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 743461, member: 18958"] Annie. I wanted to add one more thing. I worked in maximum security prisons for many years. I met thousands of men like your son. Many of these men wake up. They come to experience a before and after in their lives and they come to have great regret. There are so many factors that could be underlying your son's descent. Right now he is living within a nightmare, and everything he experiences is perceived through its veil. The veil could be drugs. It could be an acute mental illness. It could be character. It could be neurological. It could be developmental. It could be weakness that could be overcome. Or most likely, a combination of various factors. But for many,the entry of a little bit of insight, or faith, or intervention, maturity, a great shock like long-term incarceration, or the removal of one determinant, like recovery from drugs--can catalyze a shifting. We do not have to assume that your son has been operating from what is the whole him, either that he is operating using all of his cylinders right now, or what could be his future self. The thing is that your intervention is not the catalyst that will change him. That is the only thing to be accepted right now. You would only be more collateral damage. I think that is what the therapist is telling you. How to have a voice into his life, we cannot know right now. But I feel confident that in time you will find a voice, a way. As the beautiful text/letter you wrote to him from a window into your soul, there will be other windows, too. [/QUOTE]
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