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<blockquote data-quote="Andy" data-source="post: 180168" data-attributes="member: 5096"><p>Oh Carlard, I am so sorry you are going through this. Go ahead and have a good cry - take care of yourself for your own health.</p><p> </p><p>Poor little guy has been through so much. I wish the school would be more open in asking for your input instead of suggesting home schooling. It would be so helpful if the staff would sit down and discuss what you are doing at home that helps. My difficult child goes to a private (our church's day school) school. He does not have an IEP and because the staff at our school is so in tuned to each child's needs, I feel I do not need one. The teachers will do EVERYTHING that I request from allowing a bottle of gaterade or water on his desk to chewing gum if he needs to. We discuss and come up with a plan together to handle issues. Most of the time these plans have come from the coping skills activities difficult child learned in a psychiatric hospital. I will talk to them about helping me with an IEP next Fall when he goes to public school.</p><p> </p><p>We have learned with my difficult child that he often needs a very long time to mull over something before apologizing. This could be up to 24 - 36 hours. And even at that, if he still believes he had the right to do something and can explain to me why, he may still refuse to apologize.</p><p> </p><p>I agree with the others. The SD has no right to suggest home schooling. Do they even know that you are able to home school? Not everyone has that talent. </p><p> </p><p>With everything your difficult child has been through, I wouldn't be surprised if anxiety will be added to his diagnosis. That is the diagnosis my difficult child has. He started with self harm thoughts and has felt evil. Both scare him. I don't believe that the feeling like you want to die is always suicidal. It is a statement to ask for help - stating I can't do this anymore. My difficult child's self harm thoughts had his body telling him to do things to hurt himself that could have ended in death but he did not want to die. He just wanted to end whatever was going on.</p><p> </p><p>You are a good mom - you knew something was brewing - you did not let your guard down as things started going smoother.</p><p> </p><p>Take any support you can from husband - let him get involved so that he can understand.</p><p> </p><p>I know how you feel about your mom - I just couldn't talk to my mom and certain other relatives when difficult child was admitted to a psychiatric hospital. I didn't even want to tell them he was admitted. Then I realized that I would not get the support I needed if family did not know. I have been fortunate that EVERYONE is being supportive. If you find anyone who isn't, then no more news for them and on to the next person. </p><p> </p><p>Not everyone needs to know anything or everything, but search out your support people (that will include us also so keep on board).</p><p> </p><p>How are things going today?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Andy, post: 180168, member: 5096"] Oh Carlard, I am so sorry you are going through this. Go ahead and have a good cry - take care of yourself for your own health. Poor little guy has been through so much. I wish the school would be more open in asking for your input instead of suggesting home schooling. It would be so helpful if the staff would sit down and discuss what you are doing at home that helps. My difficult child goes to a private (our church's day school) school. He does not have an IEP and because the staff at our school is so in tuned to each child's needs, I feel I do not need one. The teachers will do EVERYTHING that I request from allowing a bottle of gaterade or water on his desk to chewing gum if he needs to. We discuss and come up with a plan together to handle issues. Most of the time these plans have come from the coping skills activities difficult child learned in a psychiatric hospital. I will talk to them about helping me with an IEP next Fall when he goes to public school. We have learned with my difficult child that he often needs a very long time to mull over something before apologizing. This could be up to 24 - 36 hours. And even at that, if he still believes he had the right to do something and can explain to me why, he may still refuse to apologize. I agree with the others. The SD has no right to suggest home schooling. Do they even know that you are able to home school? Not everyone has that talent. With everything your difficult child has been through, I wouldn't be surprised if anxiety will be added to his diagnosis. That is the diagnosis my difficult child has. He started with self harm thoughts and has felt evil. Both scare him. I don't believe that the feeling like you want to die is always suicidal. It is a statement to ask for help - stating I can't do this anymore. My difficult child's self harm thoughts had his body telling him to do things to hurt himself that could have ended in death but he did not want to die. He just wanted to end whatever was going on. You are a good mom - you knew something was brewing - you did not let your guard down as things started going smoother. Take any support you can from husband - let him get involved so that he can understand. I know how you feel about your mom - I just couldn't talk to my mom and certain other relatives when difficult child was admitted to a psychiatric hospital. I didn't even want to tell them he was admitted. Then I realized that I would not get the support I needed if family did not know. I have been fortunate that EVERYONE is being supportive. If you find anyone who isn't, then no more news for them and on to the next person. Not everyone needs to know anything or everything, but search out your support people (that will include us also so keep on board). How are things going today? [/QUOTE]
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