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Substance Abuse
New here. 23 yr old son, a familiar tale, I'm sure.
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<blockquote data-quote="RN0441" data-source="post: 761038" data-attributes="member: 15032"><p>Welcome</p><p></p><p>I see a lot of similarity in our stories. The best thing that I did when I was in the thick of it is find a therapist for ME that specialized in addiction. That was a tremendous helping me cope but it certainly is NOT a quick fix. There is no quick fix for us or them unfortunately and that is what I so wanted!!</p><p></p><p>My son was addicted to benzos for a long time and used other drugs as well. Also there was a lot of drinking. I wish I could say my son only went to rehab three times. He went many, many times. To sober living as well. He was not responsive to most of them. Along the way I met a lot of wonderful people that managed the programs (former addicts) that gave me hope. One of the guys that stands out got sober on his own. Never went to one day of rehab. Just decided he was done with that life and knew there was something better for him. He was running the program and in college and very happy, healthy and well adjusted. He said he thought my son would eventually "get it". I did not believe him.</p><p></p><p>Usually the programs do not want them to have much contact with anyone outside of the program. At the last one my son was at (the Christian program that turned his life (and our life) around) we couldn't talk to him for a month and then only a short call once per week. We didn't see him for a long time either.</p><p></p><p>Anytime I visited him at any program he was in it was VERY hard on me. Don't get your hopes up. He is not going to be himself yet. Recovery is a jagged line. A very jagged line. Even though I had SO many disappointments along the way, every single thing that my son did was a small seed in him that eventually bloomed and he was able to get that monkey off his back.</p><p></p><p>I was the closest to him in his life and he was the meanest to me also. That is how it works. I don't know why.</p><p></p><p>My silver lining is that now my son is 26 and lives with us. He's been back home for 3 years. He is in college and working. He will move back to Chicago in August alone. Our older two boys are there. We will follow a year later. We are all currently on the Alabama coast for my job. He and I are very close again. I got my son back!!!!! He still drinks, sometimes more than he should, but otherwise is very responsible and mentally healthy. </p><p></p><p>He is not perfect. I am not perfect either. But our life is good. My son does not want to disappoint us anymore and he does not want to disappoint himself either. He said he is done making bad choices. That is music to my ears. I am so happy we are here now but my heart goes out to you as I have been there.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="RN0441, post: 761038, member: 15032"] Welcome I see a lot of similarity in our stories. The best thing that I did when I was in the thick of it is find a therapist for ME that specialized in addiction. That was a tremendous helping me cope but it certainly is NOT a quick fix. There is no quick fix for us or them unfortunately and that is what I so wanted!! My son was addicted to benzos for a long time and used other drugs as well. Also there was a lot of drinking. I wish I could say my son only went to rehab three times. He went many, many times. To sober living as well. He was not responsive to most of them. Along the way I met a lot of wonderful people that managed the programs (former addicts) that gave me hope. One of the guys that stands out got sober on his own. Never went to one day of rehab. Just decided he was done with that life and knew there was something better for him. He was running the program and in college and very happy, healthy and well adjusted. He said he thought my son would eventually "get it". I did not believe him. Usually the programs do not want them to have much contact with anyone outside of the program. At the last one my son was at (the Christian program that turned his life (and our life) around) we couldn't talk to him for a month and then only a short call once per week. We didn't see him for a long time either. Anytime I visited him at any program he was in it was VERY hard on me. Don't get your hopes up. He is not going to be himself yet. Recovery is a jagged line. A very jagged line. Even though I had SO many disappointments along the way, every single thing that my son did was a small seed in him that eventually bloomed and he was able to get that monkey off his back. I was the closest to him in his life and he was the meanest to me also. That is how it works. I don't know why. My silver lining is that now my son is 26 and lives with us. He's been back home for 3 years. He is in college and working. He will move back to Chicago in August alone. Our older two boys are there. We will follow a year later. We are all currently on the Alabama coast for my job. He and I are very close again. I got my son back!!!!! He still drinks, sometimes more than he should, but otherwise is very responsible and mentally healthy. He is not perfect. I am not perfect either. But our life is good. My son does not want to disappoint us anymore and he does not want to disappoint himself either. He said he is done making bad choices. That is music to my ears. I am so happy we are here now but my heart goes out to you as I have been there. [/QUOTE]
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New here. 23 yr old son, a familiar tale, I'm sure.
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