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<blockquote data-quote="Sumsky" data-source="post: 731086" data-attributes="member: 22893"><p>Copabanana we have caught him eavesdropping several times now. My husband and I were talking in our living room which is around the corner from our stairs. I got up to get something and saw him sitting on the stairs listening. I also think SS thinks if I am not there that this will go away for him. He doesn’t realize that us trying to work this out is the best option possible for him. Getting him treatment is the best option for him. He is very manipulative and keeps talking to husband about it being just them. My husband and I have agreed to try to work through this with the understanding that we also have to do what’s best for thekids. Husband is slowly seeing more of the issues with SS. I know this may seem as if I’m not considering my daughter and that is just not the case. It is just a slow process to get everything in place for treatment. But Through the process, husband is seeing things a lil clearer also. I think he realizes what needs to happen, it’s just very hard for him to make that decision. SS does not realize what he is doing and what kind of situation he may be putting himself in with the things he is doing and saying. He thinks it is going to hurt me or that he can make it seem that the problems are me being neglectful. He doesn’t realize that I don’t have to cook a meal for him. All I or my husband have to do is have food available for him. He has played the victim all his life. And it has been directed at me for the past 10 years. He has also ask his great grandmother to help him and his dad stay in our home if we get divorced. Because husband has explained to him that the grass isn’t always greener on the other side. Husband explained that house would be sold and we would ALL be moving out not just me and my kids. SS doesn’t like that and since great grandma has always made everything ok for him no matter what, he thinks she can make this ok too. He definitely has a very twisted way of seeing things. So I really think he’s hearing what he wants to hear and twisting the rest to meet his needs.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Sumsky, post: 731086, member: 22893"] Copabanana we have caught him eavesdropping several times now. My husband and I were talking in our living room which is around the corner from our stairs. I got up to get something and saw him sitting on the stairs listening. I also think SS thinks if I am not there that this will go away for him. He doesn’t realize that us trying to work this out is the best option possible for him. Getting him treatment is the best option for him. He is very manipulative and keeps talking to husband about it being just them. My husband and I have agreed to try to work through this with the understanding that we also have to do what’s best for thekids. Husband is slowly seeing more of the issues with SS. I know this may seem as if I’m not considering my daughter and that is just not the case. It is just a slow process to get everything in place for treatment. But Through the process, husband is seeing things a lil clearer also. I think he realizes what needs to happen, it’s just very hard for him to make that decision. SS does not realize what he is doing and what kind of situation he may be putting himself in with the things he is doing and saying. He thinks it is going to hurt me or that he can make it seem that the problems are me being neglectful. He doesn’t realize that I don’t have to cook a meal for him. All I or my husband have to do is have food available for him. He has played the victim all his life. And it has been directed at me for the past 10 years. He has also ask his great grandmother to help him and his dad stay in our home if we get divorced. Because husband has explained to him that the grass isn’t always greener on the other side. Husband explained that house would be sold and we would ALL be moving out not just me and my kids. SS doesn’t like that and since great grandma has always made everything ok for him no matter what, he thinks she can make this ok too. He definitely has a very twisted way of seeing things. So I really think he’s hearing what he wants to hear and twisting the rest to meet his needs. [/QUOTE]
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