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No contact...Until ???
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<blockquote data-quote="LauraH" data-source="post: 759686" data-attributes="member: 22877"><p>It sounds like you are doing everything right. My son changes email addresses frequently because of some stalking issues with his ex. But that might be the best way to reach out if I needed to...although like you I would be concerned about how bad news would affect his current (unknown) mental state. I know in some cases, bad news has been withheld from someone because it could be detrimental to treatment or what have you. </p><p></p><p>I haven't specifically told my son "Call me when you make progress that lasts for more than a month or two" or any other kind of timeline, although I am thinking at least six months to a year if not more. And I won't write that in stone, because of course if he is in the hospital recovering from overdose or something, I would want to know and then act according to whatever was appropriate at that time. So the door is closed, apparently on both our ends, but mine at least is not locked and bolted.</p><p></p><p>And what do you know...he's calling me right now!. I didn't answer. He left a voicemail apologizing for yesterday and wanting to talk. I'm not ready to talk to him. I need to determine what my boundaries are as far as "no contact" until X conditions are met. I also don't trust that he won't go back into blaming and reprimanding mode and I will not let him put me on the defensive.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="LauraH, post: 759686, member: 22877"] It sounds like you are doing everything right. My son changes email addresses frequently because of some stalking issues with his ex. But that might be the best way to reach out if I needed to...although like you I would be concerned about how bad news would affect his current (unknown) mental state. I know in some cases, bad news has been withheld from someone because it could be detrimental to treatment or what have you. I haven't specifically told my son "Call me when you make progress that lasts for more than a month or two" or any other kind of timeline, although I am thinking at least six months to a year if not more. And I won't write that in stone, because of course if he is in the hospital recovering from overdose or something, I would want to know and then act according to whatever was appropriate at that time. So the door is closed, apparently on both our ends, but mine at least is not locked and bolted. And what do you know...he's calling me right now!. I didn't answer. He left a voicemail apologizing for yesterday and wanting to talk. I'm not ready to talk to him. I need to determine what my boundaries are as far as "no contact" until X conditions are met. I also don't trust that he won't go back into blaming and reprimanding mode and I will not let him put me on the defensive. [/QUOTE]
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